Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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Broken Cisterns

November 11, 2009 by Marissa 2 Comments

Have you ever noticed a period of time when every Bible study, every sermon, every life experience seems to revolve around the same theme?  It’s as if God tosses subtlety aside and very clearly says, “I want you to learn this!”  This has been happening to me lately.  And the message I’m getting loud and clear is:  Only God can satisfy me and provide the joy and peace that I need.  When I put my trust in other things, they will fail.

A couple of weeks ago, I had a very bad week.  I was sick, the kids were sick, we had a death in the family, and much, much more that I won’t go into now.  Trust me, it was a bad week.  The week was supposed to end with an overnight getaway for my hubby and me for my birthday.  We hadn’t been away overnight in a really long time, which means I hadn’t slept past 7:30 a.m. in a very long time.  So for about two months, I had my eye on October 25 as Sleeping In Day.  (Have I mentioned that I love, love, love sleeping in?)

Well, thanks to a 3-year-old with a high fever, we managed to get away for a few hours but decided to come home before the overnight (and sleeping in) part of the trip.  Rather than sleeping in and enjoying a day of outlet shopping with my hubby, I spent the day sitting at a doc-in-the-box clinic with a kid who had a fever of 104.  Good times .

In the midst of my bad day at the end of a bad week, I sat down to do my BSF lesson.  The lesson was on Jesus’ encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4:1-26).  In John 4:13-14, Jesus tells her:  “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” Then I read Jeremiah 2:13:  “For my people have committed two evils:  they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.”

So the obvious lesson here is:  Marissa is hewing out broken cisterns of sleep that can hold no water.  If Marissa were satisfied in Christ, drinking in His living water, she wouldn’t be devastated by not getting to sleep in.  And you want to know how well I learned this lesson?  So well that 5 days later, when the same child started running a fever a few hours before Getaway Attempt #2, I threw a very impressive adult temper tantrum about it.  (We went anyway, but the sleeping in eluded me as I worried about my sick kid and the poor grandparents who were stuck taking care of him.)

The whole experience (and my awful reaction to it) has me thinking about broken cisterns in my life.  Those things–some good (sleep), some bad (complaining)–that I turn to for comfort when I’m stressed, worried, tired or sad.  Those things seem to make it better for awhile, but then after a few days (or hours, or minutes), I’m right back where I was before.

Here are some questions I’ve been asked by Bible study leaders and pastors in recent month–remember, God has to make a big deal of something these days to get me to notice it:

Do the people around you see that you are completely satisfied in Christ?  If not, then why? (Please, please do not ask Noel or my good friends this question.  Maybe you could ask someone who sees me about once a month with a happy smile on my face and well-behaved children?)

Where do you turn when things get difficult? Food, tv, complaining, gossip, shopping, time to yourself? (Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. and double Yes.)

Where are you placing your trust other than the Lord? (Sleep, money, and myself, just to name a few.)

When I put the answers to these last two questions together, my behavior really shows itself to be ridiculously silly, not to mention sinful.  When things get tough, I want to grab a piece of chocolate cake and take my mind off things with some brainless television.  So basically, I’m saying to the Sovereign, All-knowing, All-powerful Creator of the universe, “Thanks, God, but I think I’ll let this cake and this tv show solve my problem.”  And then I wonder why I struggle with the same thing again the next day.  Because it should be obvious . . . God is bigger than my problems.  Chocolate cake is not. Only God can make me more and more holy, conforming me to the image of Christ so that I can love others and glorify Him.

How I’d love to leave those broken cisterns behind and drink only of the living water, finding my deepest satisfaction in my Savior.  I know it will be a continuing struggle for me, but I’m thankful that God has knocked me over the head with this lesson.  🙂

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Why I’m not blogging much

September 28, 2009 by Marissa 2 Comments

I find myself living on a runaway train these days.  I was on this runaway train right after Sarah Kate was born have jumped back on since school started.  Everything is a blur of diapers, meals, kissing boo-boos, settling toy disputes, carpool, overseeing various educational pursuits, paying the electric bill and sweeping the kitchen floor, and any coherent thought I have beyond what to make for dinner is so fleeting I’m not even sure it was there.  The runaway train isn’t bad–it is exactly what God has called me to in this season, but it doesn’t necessarily lead to much tangible productivity.  If this train should happen to make a stop at the Blogging Station, you’ll be the first to know.

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A Mother of Three

May 28, 2009 by Marissa 4 Comments

Wow, it has been a really long time since I’ve posted to this blog!  If anyone out there is still reading, thanks for sticking with me.  For any of you who don’t know me personally, I’m happy to announce that my daughter, Sarah Kate, was born on April 27.  She is healthy, a great sleeper, and very snuggly and sweet.  She has already captured the hearts of her two older brothers.  (Although her arrival may or may not have anything to do with Will deciding he is no longer going to use the potty.)

I have to admit, I was very anxious about Sarah Kate’s first few weeks.  I struggled a lot after my last baby (Will) was born–I was a mess emotionally, spiritually, and relationally.  I was hopeful that things would be different this time around, mostly because when my boys were born, I was not consistently in God’s Word.  Thankfully, by God’s grace, I have a more sure foundation this time around.

Now, one month into this grand adventure of life with three kids, I can see God’s faithfulness to our family in so many ways.  Sarah Kate’s first week was rough from a sleeping perspective . . . she was happy to sleep during the day but not at all interested in sleeping at night.  My husband had taken that first week off, so he was a huge help to me in the middle of the night.  I was terrified to think what would happen when he went back to work and couldn’t be up all night, every night with Sarah Kate and me.  But the night before he went back to work, Sarah Kate figured out that nighttime is for sleeping.  And our nights have been very manageable ever since!  God knows what we can handle, and He won’t give us a smidge more than that.

Not to keep harping on sleep (but we all know it is one of the only things a mother of a newborn can think about), but since that first week, Sarah Kate has been a great sleeper.  And our few difficult nights have usually been followed by a day when someone else is helping me with the boys and I am able to rest.  I have seen God’s hand providing for my need for sleep over and over again.

I’ve found that the most difficult thing for me right now is juggling the needs of the three kids during the day.  My temper is short and patience is lacking.  There have been some really ugly days.  I alternate between moments of overwhelming gratitude and seeing God’s faithfulness, and moments (okay, sometimes hours) of discontentment and longing for life to feel normal.  I’ve been praying for wisdom, self-control and patience this week, and God has been providing.  I know this will continue to be a struggle for me.  I am constantly being called to die to myself and my selfish desires and lay down my life for my kids.  It hurts sometimes, but God provides the strength to do it, and He is glorified by our obedience!

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Great Mommy Interview

May 13, 2008 by Marissa Leave a Comment

I am a faithful reader of Rocks In My Dryer, a witty and informative blog written by someone much wiser and funnier than I am. (Thanks to my friend Lynette for telling me about it!) Yesterday, Shannon posted an interview with her mom that contains so much great wisdom that I’m considering posting it on my bathroom mirror. I thought you all might enjoy it, too.

http://rocksinmydryer.typepad.com/shannon/2008/05/interview-with.html

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I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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Click the image above to learn more about Marissa's books: After Cancer and Loving Your Friend through Cancer

Recent Posts

  • The Journey After Cancer – CanCare Podcast {Guest Appearance}
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