Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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Approaching the Final Exam of Motherhood {Guest post on Risen Motherhood}

February 5, 2019 by Marissa Leave a Comment

This fall I watched my little boy grab his backpack full of thick textbooks, his lunchbox, and his trombone and walk into his first day of 9th grade. He’s a thoughtful boy, and he comforts me by wrapping his arms around my shoulders in a hug. (Did I mention he’s taller than me?) I have a high-schooler. And I’m terrified.

He’s been a delightful child and teenager so far. But it feels like the final exam of motherhood looms ahead, and I’ll soon find out if my parenting has been stellar or a disaster. It feels like the stakes are high, and my failures could impact the rest of his life. A verdict is coming on how well I’ve performed my most important task, and I’m hoping for a perfect report card: an A+ child, an A+ reputation, and an A+ motherhood GPA. Nothing less is acceptable to my anxious heart.

But when I look at my son as a final exam to ace rather than a fellow sinner being sanctified, I’ve forgotten the gospel. My fear stems from unbelief.


I shared these thoughts and more in an article at Risen Motherhood this week. How can we apply the gospel to our fears when the final exam of motherhood is looming? I’d love for you to click here and read the article.

While you’re there, I hope you’ll explore the vast resources at Risen Motherhood. They consistently share thoughtful, gospel-centered content via their blog and podcast. I think it will quickly become one of your favorites.

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Does God Still Love Me? {Guest post at Women Encouraged}

October 18, 2018 by Marissa Leave a Comment

I’m honored to be sharing over at Women Encouraged today. If you don’t already follow their blog and listen to their podcast, you are missing out! They serve their readers and listeners with such solid, life-giving content each week, and I definitely recommend that you check them out!

Here’s a preview of today’s post . . .


My daughter’s dark brown eyes stared up at me from her bed, just above the bright floral comforter pulled up to her chin. She tried to sound casual as she asked her pressing bedtime questions: “Mom, which one of us do you love the most? Do you love Will more than me?”

Minutes earlier, as my daughter waited for me to tuck her in, she watched me stop in the hallway and comfort her hurting brother. The questions swirled in her mind: Does Mom still love me? Does she love my brother more?

I tell my daughter I love her and prove it with my actions every day. I meet her basic needs, shower her with hugs and kisses, engage in activities she loves, and frequently put her desires ahead of my own. This little girl knows she is loved.

And yet, when her brother’s needs delayed me for a couple of minutes, my daughter began to doubt my love for her. She questioned a basic truth that had been proven to her every day for seven years.

Her doubts sound a little too familiar.


What truth can we cling to when we begin to doubt God’s love? Read more here!Share

When Motherhood Meets Cancer {Guest Appearance at Risen Motherhood}

July 11, 2018 by Marissa Leave a Comment

In October 2010, my husband and I sat on the floor in our boys’ bedroom as they ran around us in a pre-bedtime frenzy. Surrounded by bunk beds, toys, and trains, we told our young sons I had cancer.

When the doctor called earlier that afternoon, I expected him to say the lump in my breast was breast cancer or not breast cancer. Instead, I heard a strange new word: angiosarcoma. When I typed it into Google, I quickly understood why the doctor’s tone had been so serious.

Angiosarcoma has a five-year survival rate of 30%. My boys were six and four, and their little sister was 18 months old. I closed my tear-filled eyes and started begging the Lord to give us those five years. I wasn’t bold enough to ask for more.

Over the next several months, I endured seven rounds of chemotherapy, most of which involved a clinical trial at a Cancer Center, 600 miles from home. Chemo was followed by five weeks of radiation and then surgery, all out of town. I spent a total of fourteen weeks away from my family, sacrificing months with the hope of gaining years.

I wrestled through many questions during my cancer battle and the tenuous years that followed.

Could I trust the Lord to care for my children even if losing me was part of their story?

Would he meet their needs when I could not?

And at the end of this, would they be emotionally scarred or would they be spiritually stronger?

The Lord met me in that questioning place with the truth of his word. The questions never vanished, but he taught me to cling to his promises as the uncertainty raged around me.

To read the entire post, head over to Risen Motherhood – it’s one of my favorite blogs. I hope you’ll take a look around while you’re there and check out their podcast for some wonderful, gospel-centered encouragement for moms! Share

God Will Give the Wisdom You Need {No Matter What Monday}

September 26, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

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Few things in life have driven me to the Lord in prayer more regularly than parenting tweens. (Of course, I haven’t parented teens yet!) Parenting has never been easy. But it feels like the older my kids get, the less I know. And our world is changing so quickly that there are few resources to draw from. The articles and books I read overwhelm me as I realize that every child is different, every school is different, every situation is different.

I have no idea how to do this.

I wish parenting were my only area of confusion. I’ve got other questions: How many hours should I spend on activities that take me away from my family? How much should we be saving for retirement? What’s the best way to support my husband when he faces challenges at work? How do I talk to my kids about current events and the brokenness of our culture? How do I support a friend who’s going through a difficult situation?

Maybe you have tough questions, too. Here’s the good news: God has answers, and He’s willing to share them.

Job 12:13: With God are wisdom and might; he has counsel and understanding.

James 1:5: If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.

God is full of wisdom. He knows the hearts of our loved ones. He knows our circumstances. He knows what’s best for us. He knows it all.

And God is generous with His wisdom. He promises to give us the wisdom we need when we ask Him.

In which areas of your life do you need answers? Where have you turning for answers? Friends? The internet? Your own feelings? You have a deeper well of wisdom from which to draw—the unsearchable depth of the Lord’s wisdom.

No matter what you face this week, God will give the wisdom you need.

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marissahenley.com

I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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marissa.henley

When you need help, where do you turn? A few years When you need help, where do you turn? A few years ago, I realized that the internet’s vast supply of answers to life’s problems can cause us to be more disconnected from others. Before Google, if I needed to know how to poach an egg or house-train a puppy or get olive oil out of my favorite sweater, I would call my mom or a friend. Now those phone calls don’t happen because I have all the answers at my fingertips.⁠
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So when my son threw up on the loveseat in our living room, I decided to call my mom to ask how to clean it rather than typing the question into an impersonal search engine. I explained my predicament and asked her what I should do. The first words out of her mouth were, “Have you Googled it?”⁠
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I’m thankful for my helpful mom, knowledgeable friends, and of course, Google. But I’m even more thankful for the One we can turn to for help in any and every problem we face.⁠
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“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea” (Psalm 46:1-2)⁠
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God is our refuge. He provides safety because He loves us and reigns over any circumstance, any power, or any person that would threaten us. As Paul says in Romans 8:38-39, nothing in this world can separate us from God’s love for us in Christ.⁠
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God is our strength. The One who created the heavens and the earth is your helper (Ps. 121:1-2). He placed in stars in the sky and the fish in the ocean depths, and He promises to give you His strength when you’re weak.⁠
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God is always present in our suffering. This is why the psalmist can say: “Therefore we will not fear . . .” We can face our troubles with confidence that the Lord is with us. He’s not just a passive, uninterested bystander. He’s not just an automated source of abundant answers as we attempt to solve our problems. He is our heavenly Father, our refuge, and our strength.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, God is an ever-present help in trouble.⁠
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#NoMatterWhatMonday
Arkansas basketball fans will never forget that ni Arkansas basketball fans will never forget that night. It’s one of those “I remember where I was when . . .” moments. I was a senior in high school, riding home from an orchestra rehearsal. I listened on the radio as the Arkansas men’s basketball team beat Duke to win the 1994 NCAA National Championship. When we said we were #1, we weren’t just saying it—we had the trophy to prove it.⁠
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Have you ever read about God’s love for you, but the words felt hollow? Maybe as empty as the boastful claims of a losing team? We sometimes wonder if He really loves us. Our circumstances don’t always appear to reflect His love—at least not the kind of love we would choose!⁠
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And yet, God’s Word tells us that God doesn’t just say He loves us. He’s proved it. There’s no greater proof He could give than the sacrifice of His only Son.⁠
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“In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” (1 John 4:10)⁠
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Here’s how you know God’s love for you: before you ever loved Him, He sent His Son to be the propitiation for your sin. But what is propitiation, and what does it have to do with love?⁠
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Propitiation refers to Christ’s turning away God’s wrath from us by taking it on Himself. Christ laid His life over ours like a big shield, taking what we deserve because of our sin. Being our propitiation, our wrath-shield, came at a high price. The sinless One took the punishment our sin deserved and proved God’s great love for us.⁠
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When we start to wonder, “Does God really love me?” we can look at the cross and find reassurance. God sent His Son to give us new life. The Son died and took the wrath we deserved. There’s no higher price God could pay and no greater proof we could ask for.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, God proved His love for you in Christ.⁠
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#NoMatterWhatMonday
We’re continuing our study of Ephesians in the @ We’re continuing our study of Ephesians in the @first5app and today I had the privilege of sharing about the armor of God. You can read the entire teaching at the link in my bio or in the app! ❤️

Posted @withregram • @first5app When the recipients of Paul’s letter to the Ephesians were exhorted to stand firm in a battle against the spiritual forces of darkness in Ephesians 6:12 , they may have felt overwhelmed. Maybe you feel overwhelmed, too, as you look at the rampant wickedness and unending problems in our world. Maybe you’re burdened by the weight of personal temptation or past failures.  But in reading Ephesians 6, we find that God knows exactly what we will face each day and He has already supplied everything our battle requires.

God’s armor covers us from head to toe — from our helmet to our shoes. Nothing is lacking from the protection and resources God provides.

God doesn’t ask us to assemble our own suit of armor and hope it holds up against the “flaming darts of the evil one” (Ephesians 6:16). Our armor is God’s armor, and our strength is His strength. (Ephesians 6:10; Ephesians 6:13)

Our daily battles aren’t easy, but in Christ, victory over the enemy is guaranteed. (Romans 8:31; Romans 8:37)

-@marissalhenley  #First5

How can you see God providing what you need through the armor He has given?
This week, the world around us will be obsessed wi This week, the world around us will be obsessed with love. We will enjoy showing our love for others with pieces of candy taped to little paper cards, candle-lit dinners, and all the heart-shaped gifts money can buy. And while there’s nothing wrong with celebrating love and appreciating those around us, we’ll all wake up next Monday knowing that human love can’t ultimately meet our need to be fully known and fully loved. The love of family and friends is a wonderful gift from the Lord, but it’s not meant to fully satisfy us.⁠
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If you’re looking for love that never changes, never fails, and never ends, that love can only be found in the Lord.⁠
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“But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8)⁠
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“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved . . .” (Ephesians 2:4-5)⁠
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“See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are.” (1 John 3:1a)⁠
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“For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations.” (Psalm 100:5)⁠
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These verses—and many others in Scripture—reveal key insights about God’s love. First of all, God loved us while we were still sinners. He loved us when we were still dead in our sin (Ephesians 2:1-3). He will always be faithful in His love for us, and He proved that by sending His Son to die for us so we could have new life in Him.⁠
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Second, God’s love secures our place as His children. Our adoption is rooted in God’s love for us, not our being deserving of it. Our position before God isn’t like a job we can lose if we don’t perform. It’s the status of a child who’s been permanently adopted by a loving Father.⁠
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Third, God’s love never ends. The steadfast love of the Lord endures forever.  Nothing in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:38-39). We have complete security in God’s eternal love for His children.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, God’s faithful, fatherly love never fails.⁠
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#NoMatterWhatMonday
“It’s not fair!” This whiny cry is a nemesis “It’s not fair!” This whiny cry is a nemesis of parents everywhere, but it demonstrates our innate sense of justice. As those made in the image of the righteous God, we recognize what’s wrong and want it to be made right. As we finish our study of Psalm 63, we see that David felt the same way.⁠
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Can I be honest? I wanted to stop our study of Psalm 63 at verse 8. This is a tough passage, and I’m nervous that you might read a political agenda into these words. (Please don’t, and please see an important note I've added in the comments.) However, God’s justice is an important aspect of His character, and when we rightly understand it, we grow in our confidence in Him.⁠
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“But those who seek to destroy my life shall go down into the depths of the earth; they shall be given over to the power of the sword; they shall be a portion for jackals. But the king shall rejoice in God; all who swear by him shall exult, for the mouths of liars will be stopped.” (Psalm 63:9-11)⁠
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The introductory words of this psalm tell us it was written by David when he was in the wilderness of Judah. He probably wrote it while running for his life from either Saul or Absalom (see 1 Sam. 23 and 2 Sam. 15). Either way, David asked God to defend him against the wicked actions of his enemies, and David trusted God to do so.⁠
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Psalm 63 reminds us that when we are treated unfairly, we can find hope in the reign of our King, Jesus Christ. It may seem like the wicked prosper now, but God will have the final say. Jesus triumphed over all His enemies on the cross and will one day judge the world with justice and righteousness. We look forward to the day when “a king will reign in righteousness, and princes will rule in justice” (Isaiah 32:1).⁠
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On that day, “the mouths of liars will be stopped” and “every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father” (Ps. 63:11, Phil. 2:11). When we look at the world and want to cry, “It’s not fair!”, we can trust the Lord to act with perfect justice and righteousness, now and forever.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, rejoice in Jesus Christ, the King of righteousness.
I recently joined my friend @niki.hardy on her Che I recently joined my friend @niki.hardy on her Chemo Chair Prayers podcast to talk about living with the unknowns of cancer. If you or someone you love is walking through this difficult situation, I'd love for you to listen. There's a link in my bio, or you can find Chemo Chair Prayers wherever you listen to podcasts.
It was familiar routine for many years. We both cl It was familiar routine for many years. We both climbed out of the white minivan, and I locked the doors. As we stepped out into the parking lot, she slipped her soft hand into mine. She knew that she was safest when she was holding her mom’s hand as we walked through the big, bad parking lot. Even as a tween, she still reaches for my hand out of habit, and it makes me smile.⁠
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Who was holding whom as my young daughter and I walked hand-in-hand? She was the one who reached out and grabbed my hand, but I was the one who wouldn’t let go. I was the one who would scoop her up and rush her to safety if danger threatened. If she forgot to reach out and grab my hand one day, I’d reach for hers and grasp it tight.⁠
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As we continue making our way through Psalm 63, we see that David holds on to the Lord even as he is held by the Lord.⁠
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“My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.” (Psalm 63:8) ⁠
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As we’ve studied Psalm 63 this month, we’ve seen that God was refreshing water for David’s dry soul. David knew God’s love was better than life itself. He spent nights focusing on the Lord’s faithfulness rather than his worries and regrets. Today we read that as David’s soul clung to the Lord, the Lord’s right hand held him tight.⁠
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Are you struggling to cling to the Lord? Maybe it feels like your fingers keep slipping in the midst of fear and doubt. You’re trying to hold on, but your muscles are straining and threatening to quit.⁠
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If your grip on God feels weak or faltering today, take comfort in these promises of God: “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).⁠
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Keep clinging, friend. And when you’re weary or overwhelmed, remember that the Lord’s steady hand upholds you. He gives you the strength and courage to persevere in the faith. He’s got a strong grip on you, and He won’t ever let go.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, keep clinging to the Lord and trust Him to hold you.⁠
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#NoMatterWhatMonday
The house is still quiet in the mornings as I open The house is still quiet in the mornings as I open my Bible and place my coffee mug on the teal coaster that a friend gave me for Christmas. It says, “It’s as if no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.”⁠
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It’s funny because it’s true. As the mom of two teens and a tween, I had a lot of opportunities to overthink even before our world was rocked by a pandemic and political turmoil. Now my nightly overthinking has shifted into overdrive.⁠
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As we continue our study of Psalm 63, we see that David had a better approach to his bedtime routine.⁠
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“My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food, and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips, when I remember you upon my bed, and meditate on you in the watches of the night; for you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.” (Psalm 63:5-7)⁠
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Isn’t it fascinating that David specifically mentioned thinking about God in the watches of the night? He didn’t just praise God during the day - he turned his thoughts to the Lord as he laid down to sleep.⁠
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I think God understands that when we’re alone in the dark with our thoughts, we will be tempted to stew over the past or worry about the future. Through David’s words, God shows us another way. Instead of focusing on our troubles and fears, we can meditate on what God has done and remember that we can trust Him.⁠
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These verses also tell us that David had a satisfied soul and joy-filled lips. These two things are connected—when we find our satisfaction in the Lord, it leads us to praise. We are grateful rather than grumbling. We look at our gracious God and find reasons to be joyful in all circumstances.⁠
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David behaved this way because of what he believed about God. He was satisfied, joyful, and peaceful because he knew the Lord was his refuge and his help. Rather than running out on his own to fix All. The. Things, David sang for joy in the shadow of God’s wings. And so can we.⁠
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No matter what you face this week, you can shift from anxious overthinking into peaceful praise.⁠
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#NoMatterWhatMonday
Just sharing a teaching on another favorite passag Just sharing a teaching on another favorite passage - isn't Ephesians sooo good?! I was dead in my sin, but God didn't leave me there--this is the best news ever.

You can read the entire teaching at the link in my bio or in the @first5app. ❤️

Posted @withregram • @first5app “Which do you want first, the good news or the bad news?” 

I cringe when I hear this question. If I have to choose, I’d rather get the bad news over with first. In Ephesians 2:1-7, Paul shares devastating news followed by the best news imaginable. He starts with the bad news that we were all hopelessly and helplessly dead in our sin. 
 
Dead people can’t do anything to change their situation. They can’t make themselves better or even ask for help. Spiritually dead people have only one hope: a rescuer with the power to raise the dead and give them new life. Now it’s time for the good news. In Ephesians 2:4, we find these two little words that change everything: “But God.” 

You were dead in your sin, but God made you alive together with Christ. You were a child of God’s wrath, but God showed His mercy, love and kindness to you as one of His own. God has saved us so that He can spend eternity putting the immeasurable riches of His kindness and grace on display for us. Dear friends, there is no better news than that. 

-@marissa.henley #First5
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