Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

The Light Shines {No Matter What Monday}

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My daughter calls out as I start to leave her room: “Don’t forget the closet light, Mom!” This part of her bedtime routine is just as important as the kiss on the forehead. She hates being alone in her room at night—being alone in the dark would be unbearable.

As adults, we have our own versions of being scared of the dark. What dark struggle, question, doubt, or fear are you facing?  Are you searching along the wall for a light switch, for anything that might dispel the darkness? For answers, comfort, resolution, or restoration?

Isaiah 9:2: The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness, on them has light shone.

God’s people in the Old Testament walked in darkness for centuries. They awaited the Messiah, a Savior who would rescue them from the darkness of sin and death. They clung to a promise without understanding what it meant or how it would be fulfilled. How could God possibly unravel the mess caused by evil and sin?

In John 1, we see that Jesus Christ is the answer to life’s darkness. He is the light that those walking in darkness so desperately need.

John 1:5, 9: The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world.

The true light is here, breaking through the darkness. In Christ, we have everything we need to battle fear, sin, questions, doubts—even death. The darkness of these struggles cannot overcome His light. The light of Christ guarantees that the darkness will never win. He brings forgiveness for our sin, power for our struggles, and comfort for our troubled hearts.

No matter what you face this week, the light of Christ shines in the darkness.

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Three Simple Ways to Support a Friend With Cancer During the Holidays

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Three simple ways to support a friend with cancer during the holidays.

In December 2010, I laid in bed while elves decorated my house for Christmas.

That might sound like a dream come true, right? We all struggle to juggle our typical busy schedules plus the demands of the holiday season.

But the year I battled cancer, spending late-night hours wrapping gifts and baking cookies wasn’t an option. I couldn’t even care for my family, so there was no way I could prepare for the holidays on my own. Thankfully, my elves—my amazing friends—knew I needed help, and they showed up to support our family.

If you have a friend fighting cancer this Christmas, you may wonder how to support her, especially in the midst of your own busy schedule. I’ve got a few suggestions that will hopefully shed light on your friend’s needs and ways you can help.

1. Help your friend with holiday tasks.

Depending on her treatment schedule and energy level, your friend might need just a little help or an entire sleigh of elves to pull her through. Try offering to help in one of these ways and see if she takes you up on it!

  • Offer to decorate her house for Christmas.

Ask your friend if there are any decorations that they want to do as a family. Maybe they love to put the ornaments on the tree or hang the stockings, but you could put up everything else. Tell her you’ll be back after Christmas to put the decorations away, and then follow through when the time comes!

  • Offer to help with her Christmas shopping.

Let your friend know which stores you’re hitting this week and ask if she needs anything there. Or you could pick your friend up and take her with you. She can run as many errands as she feels up to and then sit in the car while you finish. This gives you the added benefit of having time with your friend while you shop!

  • Give her a hand with the gift-wrapping.

You could offer to pick up gifts to wrap at your house, or you could bring over your wrapping paper, a movie, and hot cocoa, and work together to get the job done. Either way, make sure you let her write the names on the tags. Her family will want to see her handwriting on Christmas morning, not yours.

2. Understand your friend’s mixed emotions

Having cancer during the holidays is a bummer. Your friend’s Christmas may be tainted by her treatment schedule, financial stress, difficult emotions, and the inability to travel or keep her typical family traditions.

When I had cancer, I was devastated each time my health issues kept me from being present with my family for holiday events. I was terrified that I might not have many more Christmas seasons with them and desperately wanted to make every moment special. For years after cancer, the fear of recurrence and my uncertain future complicated my emotions around the holidays. I’d pack up the Christmas decorations each January and beg God to let me be the one to open them the next year.

Depending on your friend’s situation and prognosis, she may not be dwelling on these thoughts and fears. But her emotions surrounding the holiday season might be different than they were before cancer. Here’s how you can help:

  • Ask open-ended questions.

Say something like, “How does Christmas feel for you this year?” or “Is your health situation changing the way you experience the holidays?”

  • Listen to her answer.

She may give you a chipper “I’m fine!” and move on, and that’s okay. Follow her lead—she may be feeling positive and enjoying the season, or you may not be the one she wants to open up to right now. But if she needs to process fear or sadness with you, listen compassionately and let her know you’re supporting her in this struggle.

3. Keep the meals coming.

If your friend is going through treatment or recovering from surgery, I hope there is a meal calendar for her family. But as people get busy and leave town for the holidays, there may be gaps in the schedule. Ask your friend what she needs during the holidays, and rally the elves to provide for them. Here are some ideas:

  • Stock her freezer.

Pick one or two meals this month that you could easily double. Package the extra food to go into your friend’s freezer. Recruit a few friends to do the same, and she’ll have a fully-stocked freezer to get her through the holidays.

  • Ask friends to chip in for restaurant gift cards.

This will lighten the burden on your friend during the weeks when people are traveling and unable to bring meals.

Here’s one important thing you need to know about helping your friend during the holidays:

You are absolutely not going to be able to do all these things for your friend.

I know you’re busy right now, too. You hardly know how you’re going to get food on your own table, let alone shop, wrap, decorate, and cook for others while providing meaningful emotional support.

Keep in mind that you can’t do everything, and just pick one or two ideas from this. Consider the closeness of your relationship, and pray about how you can serve her. After you’ve done your part, trust the Lord to provide for her other needs. He is always faithful to do so.

 

Photo by Caley Dimmock on Unsplash

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Jesus Christ is Your Redeeming Sacrifice {No Matter What Monday}

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Jesus Christ is your Redeeming Sacrifice. Biblical encouragement, Scripture, and devotionals for women.

The week after Thanksgiving, most of us fall into one of three groups: those who are feeling great about our Christmas preparation progress, those who are trying not to panic, and those who are blissfully optimistic that Santa and his elves will make, wrap, and deliver the perfect gifts for their loved ones on Christmas Eve.

When you’re buried neck-deep in shopping lists, tangled tiny lights, and wrapping paper, it’s easy to lose sight of why God the Son came to earth and was born in that Bethlehem stable.

I’ve got good news for you—He didn’t come just to give you more to do every December. For the next four weeks, we’ll dig into why Jesus came to earth and what He accomplished for us.

“The next day [John] saw Jesus coming toward him, and said, ‘Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!’” (John 1:29)

In this verse, John the Baptist proclaims the reason the Son of God walked on earth—to be the Lamb of God who takes away our sin.

The Lamb of God lived the perfect life. God’s justice requires a perfect sacrifice—a spotless lamb without blemish. Jesus Christ perfectly obeyed His Father and met the standard of righteousness that we fail to reach.

The Lamb of God died for you. Romans 8:32 says, “God did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all.” After living the perfect life, Jesus Christ took the punishment for your sin as He suffered and died on the cross.

The Lamb of God rose again. First Corinthians 15:55 reminds us that the Lamb of God defeated death for us: “Oh death, where is your victory?” Jesus Christ rose again, proving His power to give eternal life to His redeemed people.

In His life, death, and resurrection, the Lamb of God accomplished all that was required for your redemption. He came with a mission, and He completed it. Now that’s a reason to rejoice as we prepare to celebrate His birth!

No matter what you face this week, Jesus came to be a redeeming sacrifice for you.

(Photo by Chad Madden on Unsplash)

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Your Savior Humbled Himself {No Matter What Monday}

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Have you seen the television show “Undercover Boss”? In each episode, the CEO goes undercover as an entry-level employee of his company. The boss learns what life is like for the men and women whose jobs and lives are very different from his own. Often, the undercover boss is shocked by what he learns. And then he gives a promotion and tear-inducing gifts to one of his employees, and they all live happily ever after. (It’s “reality” television!)

When Jesus took on flesh and dwelt among us, He didn’t leave behind a board room and a chauffeur. He left Heaven. He left perfection. He left blissful fellowship with His Father.

And Jesus was not surprised by what He discovered when He arrived. He knew this world was groaning under the weight of sin, sadness, and death. That was exactly why He came to rescue us. He came to dine with prostitutes and wash the filthy feet of His betrayer. He came to save His children from the bondage of sin.

Philippians 2:5-7: Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.

What would motivate someone to leave perfection and humbly put on frailty and pain? Why would anyone trade the glory of Heaven for a life spent serving His enemies and giving His life for them? This is how much Christ loves you—He humbled Himself not only to sympathize with your weakness, but to rescue you. He gave up Heaven so that one day you could join Him there.

No matter what you face this week, your Savior humbled Himself because of His love for you.

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