Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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When You Don’t Have Any Answers {Guest post at (in)courage}

March 13, 2018 by Marissa Leave a Comment

Trust is belief that perseveres through adversity. - Marissa Henley

Facebook is a terrible way to learn a friend has died.

A heavy feeling settled in my chest as my newsfeed swarmed with strangers writing messages to Julie about shared memories.

When I saw the first “RIP,” I crumpled into a mess of tears.

Julie and I met in the radiation waiting room at MD Anderson Cancer Center. In May 2011, I reported to Waiting Room J each weekday at my assigned time. It didn’t take long to recognize the familiar faces of those with similar appointment times.

Julie struck up a conversation with me during my second week of radiation. She was about my age and recognized me from the 9th floor Sarcoma Center waiting room. (Cancer demands a lot of time in waiting rooms.) Although she was clearly in pain from the growing tumor in her leg, her smile was brilliant, shining from a face adorned with a spunky, color-streaked wig.

We bonded quickly over the chemotherapy regimen we’d both endured and the experience of being moms with cancer. We shared our life stories and cancer stories, and I learned that while chemo caused my tumor to shrink like a snowball in a frying pan, Julie’s tumor grew steadily and ominously.

We celebrated the end of Julie’s radiation, and she stood proudly beside me as I rang the bell at the end of mine. We planned to see each other when I returned to Houston six weeks later for surgery. But by then, Julie was gone.

I never found out exactly how she died. When you make friends in a radiation waiting room you don’t know each other’s people. I never met her friends or family. I had no one to grieve with, no one to share common memories with, no one to answer my questions about her final days. Did she suffer? Did she die in the hospital? Did she have enough warning to say good-bye to her son? I’ll never know.


I shared this piece over at (in)courage . . . a beautiful community of women seeking connection with each other as they follow Christ. I’d love for you to head over there to read the rest of the piece about my struggle to trust God in an answer-less place.

While you’re there, check out their site and subscribe to their daily emails–they are such an encouragement to me! 

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When You Face An Impossible Situation {guest post on (in)courage.me}

December 10, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

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It was one week before Christmas 2010. I sat in my oncologist’s office at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, 600 miles from my home in Arkansas, clutching my husband’s hand as tears streamed down my face.

My oncologist had delivered the great news first: after two rounds of high-dose chemotherapy, the rare and aggressive tumor in my breast was much smaller. But there was bad news. My platelets were dangerously low from the chemo, and I still needed at least four more rounds to have a chance at survival.

My doctor had a solution.

In a clinical trial at MD Anderson, I would receive an experimental drug to boost my platelets. But I would need to spend two out of every three weeks in Houston. At that time, I feared I wouldn’t live long enough to walk my 18-month-old daughter into first grade. I certainly didn’t want to spend any of my time in a Houston hospital room.

But I didn’t have a choice.

 

I’m sharing God’s story of faithfulness in my life over at (in)courage today! It’s a wonderful community and provides rich devotional content daily–I hope you’ll continue reading there, check out their other posts, and subscribe to their devotional emails. 

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One Cancer-Free Year

July 20, 2012 by Marissa Leave a Comment

One year ago today, on my dad’s birthday, a surgeon removed the remaining cancer from my body. Thanks be to God, that nasty cancer hasn’t been seen around here since.

Today feels like a birthday, because in many ways, Life After Cancer feels so different from what came before. Mercifully different from Life With Cancer, but also not the same as Life Before Cancer. Mostly better that life before, but with new challenges that accompany my now-complicated medical history.

I’ve been reflecting on this cancer-free year, and how it compared to the year that preceded it . . .

A year of making memories instead of missing milestones.

A year of joyful birthdays and other events celebrated in person rather than on video-chat.

A year of being the mom who showed up for everything, not to be an overachiever or super-mom, but just because I live here and have white blood cells.

A year of hearing people tell me I look good and wanting to reply, “You’re just saying that because I have eyebrows and eyelashes again!” 🙂

A year of thinking, “This time last year . . .” and giving thanks for health and normalcy.

A year of friendships with cancer warriors, celebrating healing and miracles, and pleading with God on behalf of those who are still waiting to celebrate as I am today.

A year of emotional pilgrimages back to MD Anderson, but leaving each time hearing: “No evidence of disease, see you in three more months!”

A year of adjusting to the physical, emotional and relational changes that come with cancer survivorship.

A year of struggling to figure out how God wants to use me and my experience in Cancer World for the good of others and for His glory.

A year of fighting the tendency to slip back into complacency and old habits–an effort powered by the Holy Spirit, with failures covered by the blood of Christ.

A year of giving thanks and praise to the Lord for His perfect plan–past, present and future–because of His never-ending goodness and faithfulness. He is all that we need.

Happy birthday, Dad. I love you tons. And happy Life-After-Cancer birthday to me. To God be the glory!

Romans 8:28: For we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.

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marissahenley.com

I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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Click the image above to learn more about Marissa's books: After Cancer and Loving Your Friend through Cancer

Recent Posts

  • God’s Faithfulness in a Winter Season – Part 3 {Guest post for enCourage}
  • God’s Faithfulness in a Winter Season – Part Two {Guest post for the enCourage blog}
  • God’s Faithfulness in a Winter Season – Part One {Guest post for the enCourage blog}

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