money Archives - Marissa Henley

You Can Do Hard Things {No Matter What Monday}

June 26, 2017 by Marissa Leave a Comment

The year was 1983. I sat in Mrs. Miller’s first grade classroom, facing an overwhelming task. With little six-year-old fingers, I painstakingly cut out 72 construction paper candles to assemble a birthday cake for President Reagan. It’s the first difficult assignment I remember having as a child, and it wouldn’t be the last.

Now we face grown-up challenges, don’t we? We struggle with our relationships, our work, our health, our finances, and our private wrestling with temptation, unbelief, fear, and doubt. God often gives us difficult assignments as we live as lights for Him in a world filled with sin, brokenness, and pain. But He does not leave us on our own.

In Philippians 4, Paul recalled hardships he faced as he carried out his assignment from the Lord. He was hungry and needy, and he suffered in humiliating circumstances. And yet, he found the secret to being content in these struggles. He wrote, “I can do all things through [the Lord] who strengthens me.”

You can do hard things. You can complete the difficult tasks God gives you. You can walk through a challenging relationship, career, illness, financial situation, or temptation and emerge on the other side looking more like Jesus.

Not because you’re amazing, but because your Heavenly Father is.

Not because you’re strong, but because He gives you strength.

Not because you look inside yourself and find the resources you need, but because the Spirit of God lives inside you.

You can do hard things because the Lord is strong and mighty, and He is with you in your struggles.

No matter what you face this week, you can do everything the Lord asks of you because of His strength.

God Will Give the Wisdom You Need {No Matter What Monday}

September 26, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

Few things in life have driven me to the Lord in prayer more regularly than parenting tweens. (Of course, I haven’t parented teens yet!) Parenting has never been easy. But it feels like the older my kids get, the less I know. And our world is changing so quickly that there are few resources to draw from. The articles and books I read overwhelm me as I realize that every child is different, every school is different, every situation is different.

I have no idea how to do this.

I wish parenting were my only area of confusion. I’ve got other questions: How many hours should I spend on activities that take me away from my family? How much should we be saving for retirement? What’s the best way to support my husband when he faces challenges at work? How do I talk to my kids about current events and the brokenness of our culture? How do I support a friend who’s going through a difficult situation?

Maybe you have tough questions, too. Here’s the good news: God has answers, and He’s willing to share them.

Job 12:13: With God are wisdom and might; he has counsel and understanding.

James 1:5: If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.

God is full of wisdom. He knows the hearts of our loved ones. He knows our circumstances. He knows what’s best for us. He knows it all.

And God is generous with His wisdom. He promises to give us the wisdom we need when we ask Him.

In which areas of your life do you need answers? Where have you turning for answers? Friends? The internet? Your own feelings? You have a deeper well of wisdom from which to draw—the unsearchable depth of the Lord’s wisdom.

No matter what you face this week, God will give the wisdom you need.

“Calm My Anxious Heart”–Greed

April 14, 2008 by Marissa 3 Comments

I read Linda Dillow’s chapter in Calm My Anxious Heart on greed several weeks ago and have been mulling it over in my mind ever since. Several things stood out to me:

Everything I have belongs to God. (More on this below.)
The main issue is the condition of my heart. Am I content or always wanting more? (See Matthew 6:19-21–where is your treasure?).
No one can serve two masters–whom do I serve? Am I so busy taking care of my stuff that I don’t have time to serve God and His church?
Possessions are to be used for God’s kingdom, not gripped tightly or adored. What am I holding on to too tightly? Or what daydreams about possessions consume my day? How can I better use what God has given me to serve Him?
“God can rid your heart of greed, but it is your responsibility to remove yourself from situations that promote greediness . . . stand in your house and look around. Where does greed have hold of you?” (p. 97) For me, this means throwing out catalogs as soon as I walk in from the mailbox (when does looking through the Pottery Barn catalog ever lead to feelings of contentment?!?), limiting the time I spend browsing through the mall, and being careful about spending time with people who cause me to be tempted in this area.
“Listen to your heart. Listen to your words. Look at your actions. Are you teaching your children to be grateful for God’s blessings?” (Sorry, don’t have the page number for this, and my book is currently in Europe. I wish I was with it.)

The most striking thing for me in this chapter was when she talked about everything we have belonging to God, and therefore, the question is not “how much will I give?” but “how much should I keep?” If I adopt this “How much should I keep?” attitude, it radically transforms how I view my finances. Back when we were barely making it financially, prioritizing our spending was easy–pay taxes, 10% to God, keep the rest to pay our bills, thank you very much. But now that there is more than what we need for the bare necessities of food, clothes and shelter, things seem so much more complicated.

What does God want me to keep His money for, and what does He want me to do without so I can keep less and give more? Does He want me to keep enough for a new car or an old one? Does He want me to keep His money so my kids can have clothes from children’s boutiques or Target? Does God want me to use some of His money for an XM radio subscription so I can listen to commercial-free 80’s music? (I had totally rationalized the relatively small XM radio expense until I thought about it this way.)

Now that I think about it, it isn’t complicated. I just don’t like the answer. It seems clear to me that God wants me to use some of His money to provide what our family needs, to create special memories with our kids, and for Noel and I having time alone together to strengthen our marriage. I hope God doesn’t mind my spending His money on the safest minivan money can buy (but He probably doesn’t need the sunroof), and I hope that someday He’ll let me keep enough to pay someone to clean my house (if I use the time to glorify Him by serving others and/or educating my kids).

But God probably doesn’t want me wasting His money on things that only glorify me, and that is where most of it goes. He isn’t concerned with what others think of my home decor, my purse, my clothes or my shoes. He doesn’t care if my kids have real crocs or generic ones. (I’m embarrassed to admit that I do care and went to great lengths to buy generics that look the most like the real ones. Kid shoes!! What am I thinking?!?) He’d probably like for me to realize how much eating out is an idol for me and how I shouldn’t be so lazy that I spend His money on Chick-Fil-A anytime I don’t feel like making a sandwich.

A disclaimer in case you’re still reading . . . I don’t think there is anything inherently sinful about children’s boutiques, crocs, new cars (in the interest of full disclosure, I drive a 2008 Odyssey with sunroof), Chick-Fil-A, or XM radio. It’s just that greed is an area in which the Holy Spirit is relentlessly working on me, and He is convicting me about several areas in which I am wasteful with God’s money. If you are seeking God’s wisdom pertaining to your finances, and He provides the money for you to have an XM radio subscription, you will not receive judgment from me . . . and enjoy singing along to some Chicago for me, will you?

Contentment

June 21, 2007 by Marissa 3 Comments

This is one of the biggest things I’ve been learning lately. I’m excited to write about it, embarrassed that I am just now understanding these things at 30, and humbled to realize that I’ll surely have to learn it over and over again.

I’ve always struggled with contentment. (Can I get an “Amen”?) I’m in an unusual situation when it comes to contentment with money and material things, because I’ve had to go without for a long time, but I’ve always known that a date was coming (Summer 2007) when things would change dramatically, and I could have at least some of the things I’d been lacking and desiring for so long. During all these struggles, I have defined contentment as being content with what I have right now because I know it is temporary, and someday I’ll have nice things and I won’t have to be discontent anymore. I wouldn’t have come out and said it that way, but that’s definitely the way I was looking at things. A temporary lesson in contentment. Because materialism is where I struggle the most with contentment, and of course, we all know that once you have more money, you are also more content with your marriage, kids, etc., right?!? (I hope you’re picking up on the sarcasm there.)

So the magic date when all my dreams come true is approaching–really, it is here. Several months ago, I sat down to do a budget for our new life with a “real doctor” paycheck. To be honest, I was excited to see how much more I’d get to spend on myself. Eating out, not buying the kids’ clothes at Once Upon A Child–the whole big dream world. I was devastated to find out that once we paid taxes, tithed, and had a slightly larger house, the rest of the budget pretty much the same as it always has. It’s embarrassing to admit, but it took me a couple of weeks to get over it. I was reading a book at the time, loaned to me by my friend Amy about 4 years ago (yup, she knew 4 years ago I should read it, and I stashed it in my nightstand because I didn’t want to), called God and Your Stuff. The title says it all. One thing God taught me through that book is that if I’m not content right now (at the time, that meant being content with very little), then I would never be content with more. I got the fact that I couldn’t just keep looking to the future to solve my contentment problems, because the future never would. So I tried to just keep mustering up contentment for the present.

Now, several months later, I think I’ve finally figured out why my attempts to be content weren’t truly working. I could muster up some contentment for awhile, try to be thankful for what I have because so many people have less, know God wants to teach me lessons about how to handle money, blah, blah, blah. But it wouldn’t last, and soon enough, I’d be envying someone else’s furniture and being certain that I’d be so much happier if the only designer in my closet wasn’t the guy from Target.

Recently, I was searching God’s Word on a totally unrelated subject, and I still don’t know how it happened, but I came across a series of verses that totally changed my perspective on contentment. The verses were:

Psalm 27:4–One thing have I asked of the LORD, that I will seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.

Psalm 16:11–You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Philippians 4:19–And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

I realized that I was discontent because I am seeking after the wrong things. Instead of trying to be content with less stuff, I need to take my eyes off the stuff and put them on Christ. I’m seeking comfort, approval from others, an easy life, beautiful things, less worry about money. Those things will never be enough, no matter how much money we have. But if I’m seeking the Lord, a more intimate relationship with Him, a greater knowledge of my heavenly Father, to see His beauty as I worship Him–He has promised to give me all of these things with a fullness of joy I’ve never imagined. If I desire Him, that desire will be fulfilled–completely and eternally. That is true contentment.

This is a work-in-progress in my life. I’m still way too excited about that first “real” paycheck, and it is hard to not get caught up in my new house and all the great things I’m getting to put in it. Please pray for me that I will be seeking Christ, and Him alone, and that the stuff that He gives us will be used for His glory and not my own.