Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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How to help a close friend with cancer

September 19, 2012 by Marissa 1 Comment

In a previous post, I discussed a topic on which my friends have made me an expert:  how to be a friend to someone with cancer.  Of course, it looks different if you are one of the few women closest to the woman batting cancer.  You may be leaned on more heavily for emotional and logistical support by your friend.  So this post is for those of you who have one of your besties battling this terrible disease.

Recently, one of my close friends was talking about when I had cancer and said, “what we went through . . . ” and then stopped and said, “I mean, what you went through . . . ”  I stopped her and told her that WE went through it.  I look back on my cancer journey and know that for my close family and friends, we all had cancer together.  Yes, they got to keep their hair, and our experience of the situation was different.  But they bore my burdens to such an extent that we were all heavily affected by cancer.

If you have a close friend battling cancer, it has probably changed your life. You may want to read my previous post about helping a friend with cancer.  I hope those ideas combined with this post will help you understand as much as possible what your friend is going through.  Again, I am writing about women helping women.  I won’t even try to guess what a man needs as he battles cancer.  And everyone is different, so please ask questions, or even share this post with your friend with cancer and ask her what she agrees with from her experience.

1.  Offer to coordinate help.  Find out their meal needs, food allergies and dislikes, and set up an online calendar so friends can sign up.  Your friend does not have the energy to sort through offers of meals, assign dates to people, and make sure she doesn’t get three lasagnas in a row.  Ask your friend to send out a mass email or post on her Facebook wall that all offers of help should be sent to you, and then you can organize this for her.  You may also help coordinate child care, housecleaning, and other logistical needs during her treatment.

2.  Text or call when you’re heading to the grocery store.  When I was in treatment, two of my close friends kept an envelope of my money in their purses.  They would pick up groceries that we needed, figure out my total, and pay themselves out of my envelope.  (I hope they rounded up, because I bet that was a pain.)  When they ran out of my cash, I’d hand them some more.  It was a huge help, since I was usually in Houston or didn’t have enough white blood cells to be at Wal-mart.  And if my husband goes to the store, he comes home with Ramen noodles, Pringles, and Mountain Dew.

3.  Anticipate needs she may not be thinking of (or not have the courage to ask for help with).  When it’s time to sign up for items for a school party, sign up for her, and let her know you’ll grab it at the store and take it to the school.  If your children are invited to a birthday party, offer to grab a gift for her child to take.  (See how often that envelope of cash will come in handy?)  Decorate her house for the holidays–and don’t forget to take the decorations down when the holiday has passed.  These are all tasks my close friends helped with, and it was greatly appreciated.

4.  Be sensitive to her need for normalcy.  After just spending three paragraphs telling you to do everything you can for your friend, I’m going to throw a wrench into the formula and tell you this:  your friend with cancer may be grasping at every bit of normalcy she can find.  She may want to get her own groceries and do her own laundry or get the birthday party gift herself.  Just be sensitive to what she’s capable of doing, ask questions, and let her tell you “no thanks.”

5.  Tell your friend when people ask you how she’s doing.  Cancer treatment can be lonely and isolating.  Sometimes it feels like the normal world is going on without you, while you’re stuck in cancer world.  It helps to know that people in the normal world are thinking about you and care enough to ask your friends how you are doing.    You may also ask your friend to clarify which information can be shared with others and what needs to be kept private, as many may rely on you for information about how she’s doing.

6.  Listen.  Your friend has a lot on her mind.  She’s been diagnosed with a serious illness, and depending on her treatment and her prognosis, she may be dealing with major changes to her body, her lifestyle, and her life expectancy.  You cannot fix this.  Even if you could figure out the most perfect, profound, thoughtful words to say, your friend would still have cancer.  You don’t need to have answers or perfect words.  Just sit with her, be a safe place, and listen.

7.  Remember that your friend is overwhelmed.  I hate to be harsh, because I know it is tough when your close friend has cancer.  But you need to remember that this isn’t about you.  Your friend is probably stressed, exhausted and highly emotional.  She may say or do things that hurt your feelings.  You will need to give your friend mountains of grace and forgiveness during this time, and you may want to find another friend who can help you process your feelings.  Don’t try to ask for emotional support from your friend with cancer.  She doesn’t have it to give right now.

8.  Be positive.  Whether she says it out loud or not, your friend with cancer is probably scared.  If she needs to talk about death, do not blow her off and gloss over her fears by saying, “Oh, don’t talk that way–you will be fine.”  Listen to her.  But unless her doctors have told her that her disease is terminal, she needs you to remain positive.  You may want to say something like, “I know you are scared.  If the worst happens, I will help Steve with the kids.  But we’re not to that point yet.  You are beating this!”

9.  Be in it for the long haul.  My cancer treatment lasted for more than 8 months.  And I am still dealing with the repercussions more than a year later, both physical and emotional.  When you are first diagnosed with cancer, there is a huge outpouring of love and support.  As time goes on, you start to wonder if people will move on to the next crisis before you are finished needing them.  Let your friend know that you understand this is a long-term situation, and you aren’t going anywhere.

10.  Understand that cancer will change your friend forever.  Your friend will be different, even after her cancer treatment is over.  Some of her friendships will survive this change, and others won’t.  If you want to be one of the friendships that survives, you must be willing to walk through these changes with her.  Be supportive of her new, cancer-related friendships.  Listen, ask questions and try to understand what it’s like for her as a cancer patient or a cancer survivor.  Be a safe place where she can talk about her fears and disappointments.  Know what conversation topics or events can trigger emotions about what she’s going through (or what she’s been through).  Realize that cancer will impact her life on a daily basis even after she’s finished with treatment and everyone else celebrates and moves on.

A note to my friends:  This list is compiled from the wonderful ways you supported me and from my own failures as a friend, not yours.  God used each one of you in His perfect way to be what I needed in different ways and different times.  You are one of His great expressions of His love for me, and I love you all.

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How to Help a Friend with Cancer

August 19, 2012 by Marissa 2 Comments

People tell me sometimes that I should write a book. I have no idea what this book should be about, but I think the topic I know the most about is this:

How to be the World’s Most Amazing Friend to Someone with Cancer.

I am not an expert on this because I am an amazing friend to others. God blessed me with an army of fabulous friends who loved me and supported me through nine months of cancer treatment and beyond. They have made me an expert on this topic.

Knowing that everyone reading this will someday know someone who is diagnosed with cancer, I thought I’d put all my friend’s wonderful ideas into writing. Please keep in mind that every cancer patient has different feelings, needs and desires. Your friend’s experience may be different from mine. Ask questions!

Also, I am writing about ways that women can support female cancer patients. I can barely understand my own husband, let alone what might go on in the mind of a man battling cancer.

Walking through cancer with a close friend looks very different than walking through cancer with an acquaintance or casual friend. So I will handle them in two separate posts. Today we will talk about how to support an acquaintance of casual friend who has been diagnosed with cancer.

1.  Pray for her. Tell her you’re praying for her. Pray some more. As much as your encouraging words and actions will help, nothing is as powerful as bringing your friend before the throne of her Creator and Redeemer. Long after the doctors tell her she’s cancer-free, keep your friend on your list for frequent prayer.

2.  Remember that everyone processes a cancer diagnosis differently. Don’t compare your friend’s reaction to her cancer diagnosis to other’s. Don’t assume she is feeling a certain way because that’s how you would feel. Ask lots of questions.

3.  Realize that you don’t understand. Don’t pretend like you do. Don’t try to compare something else in your life experience to what she’s going through (unless you’ve had cancer or another life-threatening illness.)

When I had a family member going through cancer, I often related her symptoms to my pregnancies, because that was my closest experience to the fatigue and nausea she was having. Now I realize that even though I never said being pregnant was like having cancer, it may have come across that way and been extremely frustrating to her. (She was kind enough to never tell me that.)

4.  Realize that having cancer can be isolating. So even though you don’t totally understand, avoid saying repeatedly that you just can’t imagine what she’s going through. Your friend with cancer doesn’t need to feel like this is so terrible that it isn’t even fathomable by anyone else. Just listen and empathize and try to understand as much as you can about what this is like for her.

5.  Offer to help. Try not to say, “Let me know how I can help.” Even though you are sincere, your friend might not know how to take you up on this offer. Saying, “Can I bring you dinner?” is better. Or try saying, “I’d like to bring you dinner next week. Would Monday or Wednesday work?”

I had a friend let me know that she was available at specific times during the week and could drive my children to school. I really appreciated her specific offer and could easily match it to one of my needs. She drove my son to preschool each Tuesday throughout my treatment.

6.  Let your friend say no to your offers of help. She may be overwhelmed by the influx of meals, she may not be comfortable with having someone else clean her house or care for her kids, or she may not be ready to accept help. Respect her no but keep asking gently and specifically from time to time.

7.  If she has an unlimited text plan, use text messages to communicate frequently that you are thinking of her and praying for her. Don’t be afraid to call your friend. She will ignore you if she needs to. But text messages are a quick and non-intrusive way to remind her that you care.

Ask about her text plan first–I racked up $50 in text overage charges after I was diagnosed and was thankful to be retroactively switched to an unlimited messaging plan!

8.  When you write her an email or text, say “You don’t have to write me back.” In the first few days after a cancer diagnosis, your friend is probably inundated with phone messages, emails and texts. It is overwhelming and time consuming if she feels that she needs to respond to all of them. And during treatment, she probably doesn’t have the energy to respond. She will appreciate your letting her off the hook whenever possible. This can apply to phone messages as well.

9.  When you visit in person, make sure she sits down. Your friend may be too proud to ask you to come past the doorway or the entryway to sit with her. But she’s probably very tired and would appreciate having a seat while you chat.

10.  Write her encouraging notes. The kind you put a stamp on. Getting notes in the mail is a wonderful surprise in these days of electronic communication. You can make your friend’s day by taking the extra time to send a handwritten note or Bible verse.

11.  If your children attend school or church together, keep your sick kids at home. We’ve all been there. You want to pretend that your toddler with a low-grade fever is cutting teeth or that green snot coming out of their nose is allergies. But your friend needs her kids to stay healthy. If she is receiving chemotherapy, she may not have the white blood cells to fight infection, and a small virus could land her in the hospital. Please be considerate and take extra precautions to protect her family.

12.  Throw her a Scripture shower. After I was diagnosed with cancer, a friend of mine asked my husband for the list Caring Bridge provides of email addresses of everyone who has viewed your site. She sent out a mass email asking them to mail me an index card with a Scripture and/or encouraging note. She sent me a ring to put them on and explained what she had done. For the next few weeks, my mailbox was flooded with index cards, many from people I don’t know. It was a tremendous blessing to me, and I cherish that stack of cards.

13.  Rally the troops for a freezer meal drive. If you know your friend through school or a specific organization, you can ask others to make freezer meals for her family. Find out food allergies and dislikes first, and ask if she has freezer space. If her space is limited, you can keep them in your freezer (or a friend’s) and deliver them in small batches.

My son’s school did this for us, and it was a huge blessing in those early days when our appointment schedule was unpredictable. It can also be helpful after surgery, when she may not want people in and out of her home each day delivering meals.

14.  Bring nutritious, quick breakfast and lunch food. When I had cancer, our church family and friends brought us dinner three times a week for several months. We never could have gotten through those months without them. But my kids wanted to eat three times a day, and my energy was limited. They ate a lot of Pop-Tarts! A few times, a friend brought a huge bag of homemade, (relatively) healthy blueberry pancakes for my freezer. They were easy and my kids loved them!

I would love to hear from other cancer survivors or their friends about other ways to encourage and serve a casual friend who has cancer. God was faithful to ease the burden of my cancer journey with the love and care of so many wonderful friends!

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marissahenley.com

I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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Loving Your Friend through Cancer is now available! I'm excited to share this resource with you and pray it equips you to support your friend with compassionate care.

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Have you ever muttered the phrase, “I’ll belie Have you ever muttered the phrase, “I’ll believe it when I see it”? Usually we say this while rolling our eyes and thinking, “There is no way this is actually happening.” We don’t have faith it will come about, so we have to wait to see it with our own eyes. 

This month we’ve been walking through one of my favorite hymns, “It is Well” by Horatio Spafford. The first verse showed us how we can have peace even in suffering, and then the second and third verses showed us how peace with God is the foundation of a peaceful life. In the last verse, we see how our future hope can give us peace today: 

“And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll,
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.
It is well with my soul. It is well, it is well with my soul.” 

I wonder if Horatio Spafford was thinking of the words of Paul in 2 Corinthians 5:7, where he writes that “we walk by faith, not by sight.” Right now, we can’t see God. We can’t always understand His purposes. But one day soon, we won’t need faith, because we will see our God with our own eyes: 

“They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. And night will be no more. They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, and they will reign forever and ever.” (Revelation 22:4-5) 

When we see God’s face in the new heavens and new earth, He Himself will be our light. It’s hard to imagine what that will be like, but it means we will truly understand that God is our everything. He is the answer to every question. He’s the source of all that we need. He’s the light by which we see and understand everything else. 

Right now, it can be well with our souls because we can believe it even though we don’t see it. We can have confidence that one day, our struggles and doubts will vanish, and we will live by sight in glory with Him. 

No matter what you face this week, one day your faith will be sight.
Have you ever had a relationship where there was t Have you ever had a relationship where there was tension, and that lack of peace seemed to spill over into every aspect of your life? It’s almost as if you’ve got a sore big toe that hurts with every step . . . when an important relationship is off kilter, it’s hard to ignore. 

If this is true of our human relationships, it’s even more true when it come to our relationship with the God who created us. Having peace in our relationship with God is essential to having peace in other aspects of our life. 

This month we’re looking at the hymn, “It is Well.” Last week we saw that Jesus gives us peace through His Spirit, even in the midst of difficult circumstances. This week we’ll look at the second and third verses of this hymn, which tell us how we can have peace with God: 

“Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control, 
That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul. 

My sin - O, the bliss of this glorious thought! - 
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more, 
Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord, O my soul!
It is well with my soul. It is well, it is well with my soul.” 

In these two verses, we see how the author of the hymn connected his peaceful soul with Christ’s sacrifice for him. We find this same truth in the words of the apostle Paul in Romans 5:1: 

“Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.” (Romans 5:1)

Because Christ took the penalty for our sin on the cross, we have peace with God. We are reconciled to our Heavenly Father and Righteous Judge, the Lord God Almighty. We are justified, which means we are declared righteous by God because of the righteousness given to us by Christ through faith. 

This peace with God is a gift from God through Christ’s sacrifice. Because we didn’t earn it, it can’t be taken away. In all circumstances, we who have placed our faith in Christ can have peace in our souls, because we have peace with God. 

No matter what you face this week, you have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Many years ago, before my own cancer diagnosis, I Many years ago, before my own cancer diagnosis, I followed the blog updates of a mom whose young daughter was battling brain cancer. I was amazed at how this woman still clung to her faith in Christ and proclaimed His faithfulness, even in the midst of unimaginable suffering. Because of her faith in Christ, there was a foundation of peace beneath the turmoil she and her family endured.

This month we are going to make our way through one of my favorite hymns, “It is Well.” The author of this hymn, Horatio Spafford, also experienced great suffering. In 1873, his wife and children took a voyage across the Atlantic, and his four daughters died in an accident at sea. As he crossed the ocean to reunite with his wife, he wrote these lyrics: 

“When peace like a river attenders my way, 
When sorrows like sea billows roll, 
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, 
It is well, it is well with my soul. 
It is well with my soul. It is well, it is well with my soul.” 

How can we have peace when nothing around us feels peaceful? The answer can only be found in the peace that Jesus gives: 

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27) 

Jesus promises us peace that is different than any peace the world has to offer. The world’s peace is tentative and temporary, because it is dependent on our circumstances. Jesus’s peace is steadfast and eternal, because it is rooted in the character and purposes of God. We can be calm in the midst of suffering because we belong to the One who rules over all things. We are secure in His faithful hands. 

When Jesus spoke these words to His disciples in John 14, He was explaining that He was going away and the Father would send the Holy Spirit. He told them that the Spirit would “teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you” (John 14:26). The Spirit reminds us of God’s promises that we receive in Christ Jesus. He gives us peace that only comes from Him. 

No matter what you face this week, Jesus offers you His perfect peace.
I love this quote from D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones: “H I love this quote from D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones: “Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself?” 

What a great question to ask: Am I talking to myself or listening to myself? When I’m listening to myself, I’m usually focused on my problems and wallowing in my emotions. In those moments, I need to talk to myself and remind myself of the truth about the Lord and His work in my life. 

That’s what David did in Psalm 103. He gave his own soul a little talking-to. He told himself—and other worshippers of God—to bless the Lord and remember all that He’s done. 

As we wrap up our month in Psalm 103, we see one last truth about the Lord and David’s response of praise in Psalm 103:19-22. 

“The LORD has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all . . . Bless the LORD, O my soul!” (Psalm 103:19, 22b)

Just in case there was any doubt about whether or not God can do all He has promised in this psalm, David spoke to himself about God’s sovereign rule over all. The Lord is on his throne. There is nothing that is beyond His reign. Everything falls under His royal authority. 

David bookended this psalm with the phrase, “Bless the LORD, O my soul” (Psalm 103:1, 22). He reminded himself of God’s goodness, listed out reasons to praise the Lord, and exhorted himself to praise God with all that he had. 

So how can you shift from listening to yourself to talking to yourself today? Take a minute to read through all of Psalm 103. Remind yourself of who God is and what He has done. Talk to yourself about His benefits: His steadfast love, His generous forgiveness, His forever promises, and His sovereign rule. Don’t forget all the benefits you’ve been given in Christ. Remember and respond to your Redeemer with praise and thanksgiving. 

No matter what you face this week, praise your sovereign Redeemer and King. 

P.S. It’s time for my annual summer break! I appreciate you joining me here each Monday for these devotionals, and I plan to be back after Labor Day. I hope you have a wonderful summer!
There’s a saying in my part of the country—and There’s a saying in my part of the country—and maybe your part, too—“If you don’t like the weather today, wait until tomorrow.” It’s especially true in the spring and fall, when the weather changes drastically from day to day and even from hour to hour. How am I supposed to tell my kids to dress for school when they need a coat in the morning and shorts in the afternoon? So much in life is constantly changing, whether it’s the weather, relationships, culture, or parenting—it feels like nothing stays the same.

We’re studying Psalm 103 this month, and we’ve seen David remember God’s benefits: His forgiveness, healing, redemption, sustaining power, and steadfast love.  In Psalm 103:15-18, David celebrated the eternality of God’s character. These truths he was remembering aren’t just for a fleeting season. They’re not here today and gone tomorrow. The steadfast love and promises of God last forever.

“But the steadfast love of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children’s children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments.” (Ps. 103:17-18)

David contrasted God’s eternal character with the fleeting nature of man. In verses 15-16, he said we are like grass that the wind blows away. Nothing in our human world lasts forever. Relationships change. Careers end. Bodies age and die. But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting. He keeps His promises not just to us, but to the future generations that follow.

Psalm 103:18 says this steadfast love is for those who keep His covenant. God made covenant promises to His people throughout the Old Testament. He promised to bless them, and they promised to obey. When the people failed to keep their part of the covenant, God sent His Son to live an obedient life and die on the cross for His covenant-breaking people.

Galatians 3:29 tells us that if we belong to Christ, we are heirs to all God has promised. Because of Christ’s sacrifice, we are the covenant children of God who receive His promised, everlasting, steadfast love, now and forever.

No matter what you face this week, remember God’s everlasting covenant promises.
Do you remember the last time you were asked to in Do you remember the last time you were asked to introduce yourself to a group of people? It always feels so awkward to me. I think, “What were those things the group leader asked us to say? What do these people really want to know?” It’s hard to sum up who you are in just a few sentences.

This month we’re walking through Psalm 103 together as David remembered all of God’s benefits. In verses 6-14, David remembered what the Lord told His people about Himself: His righteousness, His character, and His forgiveness.

“He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel. The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.” (Ps. 103:7-8) 

In verse 8, David echoed the words God spoke about Himself when He  proclaimed His name to Moses in Exodus 34:6. We know this is God’s character, because God chose to reveal Himself. The Lord is merciful. He is gracious. He is patient with us, and His constant, faithful, covenant love overflows.

David continued in Psalm 103 to try to capture with words the steadfast love and forgiveness of God:

“For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” (Ps. 103:11-12)

David used some big-time analogies to portray these benefits for God’s people. God’s steadfast love is as high as the heavens are above the earth. How far do the heavens reach? Further than our human minds can imagine!

Our sins have been separated from us as far as the east is from the west. I wonder if David saw the sun rise in the east and set in the west and imagined places in both directions that he’d never see in his lifetime. He wanted us to know that when God removes our sin, it becomes untouchable. God’s forgiveness is complete, sufficient, and permanent. 

This forgiveness is given to God’s people through our Savior, Jesus Christ. Romans 5:8 tells us that “while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” We can look to Christ and remember God’s steadfast love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness. 
 
No matter what you face this week, remember God’s steadfast love and forgiveness.
I don’t love a lot about Facebook these days, bu I don’t love a lot about Facebook these days, but I often log in to check my Memories section. I posted pretty frequently (probably too frequently!) when my kids were little, and it’s fun to screenshot the funny things they said and send them to those same kids who are now teens. I’m grateful for these glimpses into the past that help me remember those precious moments. 

This month we’ll be walking through Psalm 103. In this psalm, David calls himself—and all the people of God—to bless the Lord and remember all His benefits. In these first five verses, David lists several benefits he wanted us to remember: 

“Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.” (Psalm 103:1-5)

God forgives. This forgiveness is complete—He forgives all your iniquity. We’ll dig into the details of this gracious forgiveness next week!

God heals. While God often heals our physical diseases, the healing the psalmist probably had in mind here is our spiritual healing from the disease of sin. As 1 Peter 2:24 says, “[Christ] himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.” 

God redeems. When you were in the pit of guilt, shame, and death, the Lord was the one who rescued you. 

God surrounds you with steadfast love and mercy. “Crown” means to encircle or surround. The steadfast love and mercy of God surrounds you today. 

God satisfies you and sustains you. God’s goodness fills us up and fuels us for the Christian life. 

When we remember who God is and what He’s done for us, it leads us to trust Him more deeply and praise Him as He deserves. And unlike my toddlers who’ve grown into teens, God never changes. As we remember, we can depend on His unchanging character to be the same for us today and every day. 

No matter what you face this week, remember the benefits you’ve received from the Lord.
Years ago, my young daughter was stalling before b Years ago, my young daughter was stalling before bedtime in one of my favorite ways—by showering me with compliments from head to toe. As she moved from my hair to my clothes, she mentioned my wedding ring with the “fake diamond in it.” I laughed and corrected her, “No, Sweetheart, that’s actually a real diamond.” Her jaw dropped and her eyes widened. “Mom!” she exclaimed. “You’re rich! You should take that to someone to sell it and buy me an American Girl doll!” 

Sometimes I feel the same way when I see the riches of God in display in His Word. The riches of the Father’s mercy (Eph. 2:4). The riches left by the Son when He took on flesh (2 Cor. 8:9). The Holy Spirit richly poured out through salvation in Christ (Tit. 3:5-6). 

My jaw drops and my eyes widen when I think that the One who has everything would choose to make me His child and provide me with an eternal inheritance. My Savior sacrificed it all to redeem me and purchased my salvation with His blood. 

For the past three weeks, we’ve been looking at our adoption as sons and daughters of God in Galatians 4. We’ve been adopted by God’s free grace, we have the privilege of calling God our Father, and we are no longer slaves to the law. Today we’ll see that our adoption makes us heirs to a glorious inheritance. 

“So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God” (Gal. 4:7). 

As children of God, we have a promised an inheritance that is imperishable and kept for us in heaven (1 Peter 1:3-4). Romans 8:17 tells us that we are co-heirs with Christ, and we can only imagine what His inheritance must be like! 

God’s abundant provision for us isn’t just the riches of eternal life with Him. He also gives what we need each day. In Matthew 7, we read that just as earthly parents give their children what they need, our heavenly Father will do the same for us. In the riches of His grace, He has everything that we need, and He will not withhold any good thing from us (Ps. 84:11). 

No matter what you face this week, God has made you an heir to the riches of His grace.
When I was a kid, I loved the movie “Annie”. W When I was a kid, I loved the movie “Annie”. When Annie first arrived at Mr. Warbucks’s house, the staff showed her around the house and asked what she would like to do first. Annie started listing areas she would start cleaning, because that’s what she was used to doing at the orphanage. She misunderstood why she was brought to Mr. Warbucks’s mansion. She wasn’t there as a servant but as a guest - and eventually as an adopted daughter. 

For the past couple of weeks, we’ve been looking at our adoption as sons and daughters of God. In Galatians 4:7-9, Paul contrasts the role of a slave and a son as he explains our adoption by God’s grace. 

“So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God. Formerly, when you did not know God, you were enslaved to those that by nature are not gods. But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more?” (Galatians 4:7-9)

In this portion of Galatians, Paul is in the middle of a larger argument about slavery and redemption. The church at Galatia had been led astray by teachers who said they had to earn their salvation by keeping the law. Paul wanted them to understand that they were no longer slaves, but they had been set free to be sons and daughters of God. 

God has always been the God who redeems His children from slavery. In Exodus 2, God heard the groaning of His people, the Israelites, who were enslaved in Egypt.  Exodus 2:25 says, “God saw the people of Israel—and God knew.” God heard, God knew, and then God acted to bring His people out of slavery and give them a secure place in the Promised Land. 

God acted to redeem us from slavery to the law by sending His Son to die as an atoning sacrifice for our sin (Galatians 4:4-5, 2 Corinthians 5:21). Now we live in the freedom of adoption—children who have been saved by grace and are no longer in bondage to the burden of the law. 

No matter what you face this week, we are no longer slaves, but adopted children of God.
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