Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

Your Heavenly Father Knows Your Struggles {No Matter What Monday}

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ps 56.8Psalm 56:8: You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? 

 

When my daughter was younger, I convinced her that I literally had eyes in the back of my head. She couldn’t see the extra pair of eyes, but all evidence pointed to their existence. I had an uncanny way of knowing what she was doing, even when I wasn’t looking at her. Sometimes she didn’t realize I could see her in the rearview mirror in the car or hear her from the next room. Sometimes I made an assumption based on what I knew about how she behaved. Sometimes it was purely a lucky guess.

 

As much as my knowledge freaked her out, I think it also brought comfort to my young daughter. There is something reassuring about being known deeply by someone who cares about you.

 

Psalm 56:8 is one of my favorite verses, because it tells me that God knows my struggles, my sleepless nights, and my tears. He doesn’t know these details of my life because of eyes in the back of His head or because He made a lucky guess. He knows each tear because He created me, redeemed me, cares for me, and rules over every circumstance of my life.

 

When I spent months away from my family in 2011 battling cancer, I filled many of God’s bottles with my tears. When I was weighed down by sorrow and fear, I found comfort in knowing that God cared about every single tear that I shed.

 

No matter what you face this week, you have a Heavenly Father who knows your struggles and cares about every tear. How does this truth bring you comfort today?

 

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Nothing Can Separate You From God’s Love {No Matter What Monday}

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Nothing

I have planned my husband’s funeral countless times.

My husband is a perfectly healthy forty-something-year-old who has never been in a life-threatening situation that I’m aware of.

But sometimes he is late coming home from work.

When he’s late coming home from work, I start to think he’s dead on the side of the road.

And when I start to think he’s dead on the side of the road, I mentally plan his funeral. If he’s really late, I might even brainstorm some of the hymns we’ll sing.

Sometimes I try to make myself feel better by telling myself that surely he just got one more phone call on his way out of the office. But the reality is that I’m not guaranteed to grow old with my husband. Sometimes telling myself the worst won’t happen doesn’t quite calm my fears.

But one truth that can calm my fears is this: no matter what, nothing can separate me from the love of God in Christ Jesus. The matchless, unfathomable love of Christ is a guarantee I can cling to.

What are you facing this week? What are you afraid of? Can it separate you from the love of God in Christ Jesus?

Filter your challenges and fears through this test:

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:38-39

We face many losses in this life, and they are heartbreaking. But we will never face the loss of His love.

No matter what you face this week, nothing can separate you from the love of God in Christ Jesus.

 

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Why I Shrugged When I Saw My Shattered iPhone Screen

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If the people walking behind me at camp last Saturday were paying attention, they probably thought I was really strange.

 

I was walking to the car with my son after picking him up from his first week at overnight camp.  I had several things in my hands, and I dropped my iPhone on the pavement.  I picked it up and saw that the screen was completely shattered.  I shrugged, showed my son, and quietly said something like, “Oh.  Bummer.”  Then I calmly walked to the car like nothing had happened.

 

If I saw someone respond that way to a broken phone, I’d think they were either extremely easy-going, filthy rich or absolutely insane!

 

Here’s what any campers and parents who noticed the incident didn’t know:  just one week earlier, my cellular service contract had expired.  I was eligible for a phone upgrade at a discounted price, and I had my eye on a new iPhone 6.  The night before, I asked my husband if I could get one, and he said I could!  I planned to go pick one up that very week.  When I saw the broken phone, I thought, “I get my new phone today!”

 

The expectation of a new phone caused me to respond to adversity in an unexpected way.  

 

In a similar way, God’s promises enable His children to respond to suffering in unexpected ways.  Christ’s victory over sin and sickness and sadness and death empowers us to face difficult circumstances without fear and despair.

 

When I was diagnosed with cancer as an almost-34-year-old mom of three young kids, I didn’t shrug my shoulders and say, “Oh, bummer,” and go on like nothing had happened.  I was heartbroken.  I was scared.  But there was also a sense in which I was peaceful.  I knew I could trust God’s plan for my life when my plans had been shattered.

 

I know that God is making all things new and that He will make all things new.  He is currently making all things new as He walks with us through dark times and pours out His grace, comfort and peace.  He is weaving our threads of suffering into a beautiful tapestry for His glory.  And He will make all things new one day when we are with Him in new bodies and a new heaven and a new earth.

 

I am convinced that God’s promises are true.  I am convinced that NOTHING can separate us from God’s love in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:38-39).  I praise God that I can cling to Him as my Rock when it feels like my whole world has been shattered (Isaiah 26:3-4).

     

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”

     And he who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Also he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

Revelation 21:3-5

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Coping With Scanxiety (And Other Scary Things)

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In a few weeks, I will travel to Houston for my next cancer follow-up appointments. I’ll be honest and say that I HATE these appointments. I hate having to ask other people to take care of my kids for three days for something that isn’t fun. I hate having to travel down there. I hate the process of getting blood drawn, getting an IV, sitting around the waiting room, and laying in the scanner. I hate waiting until the next day to see my doctor for results. I hate walking the halls of the hospital and re-living the unpleasant memories. I hate those moments when I wait in the exam room for someone to come in and tell me whether or not I have recurrent, metastatic angiosarcoma.

 

I wish I could say that I waltz through all of this with joy, peace and complete confidence in God’s good plans for me and my family. But when they take my vital signs before I see my doctor for results, I usually end up having to tell the nurse that no, my pulse isn’t going to slow down unless she waits until after I get my scan results. Even just typing these words and thinking about being there makes my pulse quicken! The anxiety related to cancer follow-up scans is so intense that we survivors have our own word for it:  scanxiety.

 

A friend asked me recently how I deal with the anxiety related to these appointments. Since I’ve been doing this for 4 years now, I’ve given it a lot of thought! Her question got me thinking about my coping strategies for anxiety and how they might be helpful to others.

 

1.  Do the Next Thing

There are times when all I can do is just get through it. In the weeks before my scans, I know my focus needs to be on today and not on tomorrow or next week or three weeks from now. The Lord says to leave tomorrow to Him (Matthew 6:34).  So one way I cope with anxiety is to push the thoughts of the future aside and focus on what God has asked me to do right now. Put one foot in front of the other and do the next thing.

 

2.  Promises from God’s Word

I love, love, love God’s Word. God will never fail to keep His promises. There are many promises in God’s Word that have become especially precious to me in the midst of anxiety. Here are just a few:  Psalm 46:1-2, Psalm 46:10-11, Psalm 73:25-26, Psalm 112:7-8, Psalm 121:1-2, Isaiah 26:3-4, Isaiah 43:1-2, Jeremiah 31:3, Lamentations 3:21-24, Habakkuk 3:17-19, John 16:33, Romans 8:38-39, Romans 15:13.

 

3.  Prayer

I also take my fears and concerns to the Lord in prayer. I am so thankful that Christ made a way for us to come before our Father’s throne and ask for help (Hebrews 4:16). My prayers in the midst of anxiety are not fancy or articulate. They usually go something like this:  “Please, God, don’t let me have cancer. This is so hard. Please help me.”

 

4.  Asking Others to Pray

Our Heavenly Father doesn’t ask us to carry our burdens alone – He gives us a family, the body of Christ (Galatians 6:2). Often, I will share my struggle with anxiety with others and ask them to pray for me. I’m thankful for friends who are willing to share my burden and pray for me. It brings me great comfort.

 

5.  Remembering God’s Past Faithfulness

Lamentations 3:21-23: But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

When I’m having a difficult time trusting God’s future faithfulness, I call to mind God’s past faithfulness.  Here’s a little math equation for you . . .

Past faithfulness + never changing = future faithfulness guaranteed! 

God has been faithful to me in the past. I could write all day about the ways He has worked in horrible circumstances for my good and for His glory.

God never changes.  Never ever, no matter what. Therefore, I can put my hope in His future faithfulness in all circumstances.

 

Doing the next thing, reading God’s promises, praying, asking for prayer and remembering the Lord’s trustworthiness don’t make my fears vanish. But these strategies remind me where to run when I am afraid:

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me? (Psalm 56:3-4)

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