Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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10 Ways to Pray for Your Friend with Cancer

March 17, 2016 by Marissa 4 Comments

10 ways to pray

(The following is an excerpt from my book, Loving Your Friend Through Cancer.)

During one of the most difficult times in my treatment for cancer, my friend Sarah had a dream that she shared with me. Here is her description of the dream, in her own words:

“We were in a very large cathedral-style church. The pews were packed with people, some I recognized from church, but many I did not recognize at all. Everyone was praying and writing. They were writing their prayers. At the front of the church the stage was some sort of hospital room and you were lying on a table with doctors and nurses bustling around you. I talked to one woman who said, ‘I don’t know Marissa personally, but I’m honored to be here to pray for her.’ I was amazed at the outpouring of prayer for you and your healing. Everyone was giving you their prayers after they wrote them down as they left the church. I peeked at some of the letters and they all began with praise to God by worshiping his Name (mighty God, everlasting Father, omniscient, all-powerful, etc., just like we’ve learned from Isaiah). SO AWESOME.”

Her dream was an encouragement to me at a time of intense struggle and sorrow, because I knew it accurately depicted what was happening before the throne of the almighty God. Thousands of people were interceding on my behalf, including many I have never met. I regularly received cards from strangers saying they were praying for me. I received dozens of small yellow postcards from the prayer room of a church in Tennessee, letting me know someone had prayed for me. I still don’t know who put my name on that prayer list in Tennessee, but I am thankful.

Nothing is as powerful as bringing your friend before the throne of her creator and redeemer. Interceding on her behalf before the Lord of the universe is one of the greatest gifts you can give her. Long after the doctors tell her she’s cancer-free, keep your friend on your list for frequent prayer. And if the Lord calls your friend home to heaven, keep fervently praying for her loved ones.

Let your friend know you are praying for her on a regular basis. But please don’t just say it flippantly—do it! Your prayers for your friend not only benefit her as you intercede for her, but they will also benefit you as the Lord works in your heart in the midst of your own grief.

Pray for healing for your friend, of course. But don’t stop there. Here are some additional ways to pray for your friend.

  1. Pray for her to feel the closeness of the Lord as he strengthens, sustains, and comforts her (Isaiah 41:10, Psalm 62:1-2, Psalm 63:5-8).
  2. Pray for wisdom for friends and family members to support and encourage her in ways she needs the most (James 1:5).
  3. Pray against the feeling of isolation—physically, emotionally, and spiritually (Joshua 1:9, Hebrews 13:5b, Psalm 42, Psalm 56:8).
  4. Pray for wisdom in making medical decisions so that the patient, family members, and doctors will not have any regrets (Psalm 112:7-8).
  5. If she’s married, pray for God to strengthen her marriage and deepen her connection with her husband, and that she will look to the Lord to meet her needs when her husband falls short (Ephesians 5:22-23).
  6. Pray that she would develop a deep and abiding trust in the Lord, not placing her hope in a particular outcome, but wholly in God’s character—his sovereignty, goodness, and faithfulness to her specifically in this situation (Isaiah 43, Jeremiah 31:3, Romans 8:38-39).
  7. Pray that she will feel free to ask for help and support when she needs it, claiming the promise that God will meet all her needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
  8. Pray for joy and peace as she grieves the loss of her health and her “before cancer” expectations for her life, and that she will not be anxious about the future (Romans 15:13, Lamentations 3:21-24, Philippians 4:6-8).
  9. Pray that she will not waste her suffering, but be transformed and sanctified through the experience of suffering for God’s glory (Romans 8:28-29, Romans 12:1-2).
  10. Pray that God will prepare her to comfort others with the comfort she is now receiving (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

You’ve just read one of the chapters of my book, Loving Your Friend Through Cancer.  Want to learn more?

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Your Heavenly Father Knows Your Struggles {No Matter What Monday}

March 14, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

ps 56.8Psalm 56:8: You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? 

 

When my daughter was younger, I convinced her that I literally had eyes in the back of my head. She couldn’t see the extra pair of eyes, but all evidence pointed to their existence. I had an uncanny way of knowing what she was doing, even when I wasn’t looking at her. Sometimes she didn’t realize I could see her in the rearview mirror in the car or hear her from the next room. Sometimes I made an assumption based on what I knew about how she behaved. Sometimes it was purely a lucky guess.

 

As much as my knowledge freaked her out, I think it also brought comfort to my young daughter. There is something reassuring about being known deeply by someone who cares about you.

 

Psalm 56:8 is one of my favorite verses, because it tells me that God knows my struggles, my sleepless nights, and my tears. He doesn’t know these details of my life because of eyes in the back of His head or because He made a lucky guess. He knows each tear because He created me, redeemed me, cares for me, and rules over every circumstance of my life.

 

When I spent months away from my family in 2011 battling cancer, I filled many of God’s bottles with my tears. When I was weighed down by sorrow and fear, I found comfort in knowing that God cared about every single tear that I shed.

 

No matter what you face this week, you have a Heavenly Father who knows your struggles and cares about every tear. How does this truth bring you comfort today?

 

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Do you need the perfect gift for a cancer-fighting friend?

March 10, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

I had the privilege today to write for the Cancerwise blog of MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston. The piece describes how to choose the perfect gift for a friend with cancer and provides suggestions for you to consider. This is a question I hear often from women who have friends facing cancer, and I hope it provides useful information!

Click here to read the article on Cancerwise, then let me know what you think!

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Jesus Will Wipe Away Every Tear {No Matter What Monday}

March 7, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

rev 21.4

If you ask my 10-year-old son what he would wish for if he had three wishes, you’ll hear a couple of the things you’d expect to hear: unlimited Minecraft-playing time, no more homework ever. But he’ll probably include one wish that might surprise you: His wish that Jesus would come back today.

 

My son can’t wait for Jesus to return. Maybe it’s because he watched me suffer through cancer. He watches me grieve the loss of friends to the disease. We take meals to sick people so often that anytime I take them with me to deliver food to someone, my kids ask if the recipient has cancer.

 

My 10-year-old understands that he lives in a broken world filled with sickness, sadness and death. But my son also understands that he does not live in this broken world without hope.

 

He knows there is a perfectly joyous ending coming. He knows that every heartache he feels will be made right when Jesus returns in glory. He knows His Savior will wipe away every tear.

 

Revelation 21:4 gives us this promise to cling to: He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. 

 

No matter what you face this week, your triumphant Savior will one day wipe away your tears.

 

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marissahenley.com

I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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Click the image above to learn more about Marissa's books: After Cancer and Loving Your Friend through Cancer

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  • The Journey After Cancer – CanCare Podcast {Guest Appearance}
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