Marissa Henley

Encouraging weary women to hope in Christ alone

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When We Slam into the Wall of God’s “Wait”

March 31, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

When We Slam into the Wall of God's

 

There’s something I want.

 

My desire is materialistic, and no small matter, but almost everyone I’ve told agrees it’s a great idea. (I have very convincing arguments.)

 

Only one obstacle stands in the way: my husband isn’t ready for me to have it.

 

And I hate being told “not right now.”

 

When my husband first started voicing concerns, I didn’t pay much attention. I only heard the messages I was speaking to myself: “You deserve to be happy. There’s no reason not to fix this for yourself.”

 

Determined to get what I wanted, I repeatedly slammed into the wall of my husband’s hesitation. Arguments began. I trampled over his opinions, armed with the certainty that I was right.

 

But rather than crumbling my husband’s resolve, the Lord started to crumble mine. You probably know the feeling—those little bursts of conviction working on your heart.

 

I decided to invite an older, wiser friend to lunch and ask her advice. When I explained the situation, I had a feeling she wouldn’t say, “Just ignore what your husband thinks. Get what you want.”

 

And I was right.

 

My friend gently pointed out my wrong thinking, selfish attitude, discontentment, and lack of gratitude for what God’s already given me. She reminded me that I can trust God to give me good things. I can wait on Him, because His ways are perfect.

 

Did I know these truths? Absolutely.

 

Was I acting like it? Not one bit.

 

As we spoke, God lovingly pried these desires from my hands and placed them into His. I’m still tempted to grab them back sometimes. I start to worry that He won’t ever give me something I think is good for me.

 

In Matthew 6, we read about God’s care for the grass of the field and the birds of the air. And Jesus calls us out in our unbelief: “O you of little faith . . . do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all” (Matthew 6:31-32, emphasis mine).

 

Here’s the bottom line: Can I trust that what the Lord gives me is always best? Can I believe that what He withholds was never mine to begin with? Can I have faith that my heavenly Father will give me everything I need?

 

What do you want that God isn’t giving? Are you struggling to trust His provision? Will you join me in learning to trust that God gives us all we need? Can we put our good desires into His hands and leave them there, waiting on His timing and His perfect ways?

 

Let’s celebrate both that God can be trusted and that His grace covers all our unbelief as we struggle to trust Him more fully.

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The Most Selfish Thing I Do

March 2, 2015 by Marissa 1 Comment

I do a lot of selfish things.  I talk too much and interrupt people.  I throw adult-style, sophisticated temper tantrums when things don’t go my way.  I spent way too much time and money caring for myself, my reputation and my stuff.  I’ve known this for a long time.

But recently, I realized that there’s another way selfishness manifests itself in my life.  Every day.  Sometimes every hour.

 

I worry.

 

I worry about myself.  I worry about other people.  I worry about the weather, about the future, about the past.  And what is at the root of almost all of these worries?  Me.

Why do I worry about my future? Because I don’t want to experience suffering.  I try to figure out a way around hardship, because I don’t like it when life is difficult or sad or confusing.  I want an easy, happy life.

Sometimes, worry masquerades as concern for others.  But it’s mostly about me.  I worry about my husband, because I want him to be perfect so I don’t have to struggle in our marriage.  I worry about my children, because I don’t want to experience the pain of their bad choices.  I worry about my friend with cancer, because I will be sad if she dies.  I worry about the weather, but only when it is going to interfere with my plans.  I worry about world events that might someday impact me and my family.

 

Me.  Me.  Me.  Me.  Me.

 

Seeing the depth of selfishness associated with my worrying helps me to see why the Bible tells us not to worry.  Over and over again:  do not fear, do not be anxious about anything, do not worry about tomorrow.

The Lord knows that when we are worrying, we are focused on ourselves.  He wants us to be focused on Him, trusting Him, accepting what He gives with a peaceful heart.  He knows that what we need more than a happy, easy life is a quiet heart that is resting in Him.

 

You keep him in perfect peace

        whose mind is stayed on you,

        because he trusts in you.

Trust in the LORD forever,

        for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock.

Isaiah 26:3-4

 

 

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Therefore

January 24, 2012 by Marissa Leave a Comment

Romans 12:1-2:  Therefore, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God–this is your spiritual act of worship.  Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing, and perfect will.

Our pastor has been preaching through Romans.  It has been so good.  I think if I could only have one book out of the Bible, I’d pick Romans.  I could read every day about what a wretched sinner I am (Romans 1 and 3), how God chose to save me through the death of His Son, Jesus Christ (Romans 3:23-25, 5:8, 10:9), that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ (Romans 8:1), and that NOTHING can separate me from the love of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:38-39).

Last Sunday, we arrived at Romans 12.  The big “Therefore . . . ”  News as fabulous and life-changing as the Gospel requires a response.  And Romans 12 tells us that our response of gratitude for what God has done for us is to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice and be transformed by the renewing of our mind.

I’ve been thinking about these verses for a few days now and pondering how my mind needs some renewal.  When I first found out that I was cancer-free and finished with treatment, I was overflowing with joy.  Anyone who asked how I was doing would get an earful about all the wonderful things God had done.

But as time goes on, discontentment and anxiety start to creep in.  I stop being thrilled to have hair and start to envy the long, beautiful hair of others.  I look around me and feel jealous of those who don’t have to go to Houston every three months for a CT scan, who don’t have to think about cancer returning, and who blissfully assume they will hold their grandchildren someday.  I start to hold on tightly to my own plans instead of being thankful for today and trusting tomorrow to the Lord because He knows best.

I hate sin.  It is so ugly.  Especially mine.

When I read, “offer your bodies as living sacrifices,” it sounds like I need to give myself, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, to the One who created me and His perfect will.  I need to say, “God, because I have received your mercy and grace in Christ, I know You are good and Your ways are perfect.  You can let this body be devoured by cancer or live 50 more years–whatever brings more glory to Your name.”  Do I have the courage to say that?  Some days I don’t, some days I do–only by the power of the Holy Spirit.

To offer my body as a living sacrifice, I need my mind to be renewed.  I’ve decided that when those envious or anxious thoughts creep in, I will focus my mind on something God has done to show His faithfulness to me, especially during my 9-month-long cancer battle.  I will choose not to be conformed to the pattern of this world, but be transformed, so I can proclaim that God’s will is indeed good, pleasing and perfect.

To God be the glory.

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Thorns in the Flesh

July 1, 2010 by Marissa 1 Comment

This summer I’m studying Loving God with All Your Mind by Elizabeth George with some wonderful friends of mine.  There are many potential blog posts coming out of this book.  This week, our study provided a fresh look at 2 Corinthians 12:7-10:

So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

The question asked, “What did Paul ask God to do about [the thorn in his flesh]?”  He pleaded three times for it to be removed.  (Really, just three times?)  The next question asked, “What was God’s response?”  Uh, the answer was a big fat NO.  But there’s more than that.  God’s “no” was that His grace and power were sufficient for Paul as he dealt with this struggle.

There are a few “thorns” in my life right now that I have been pleading with God to remove.  And to be honest, I’ve been a little frustrated that they are still around.  But after studying this passage, I don’t see God being silent about my trials, both self-inflicted and other-inflicted.  I know that if these trials and temptations persist, it is for my good and His glory as He is making me more like Christ.  If that were not the case, He would have removed them.  As I walk through the difficulties, He has promised that His grace is sufficient for each one.

We ask, “Lord, please heal my family member.”

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

We plead, “Lord, please fix my financial difficulties.”

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

We cry, “Lord, please save my unbelieving loved one.”

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

I find Paul’s attitude toward God’s graceful “no” to be very convicting.  As I continue in my difficulties, my attitude should not just be tolerating them and getting through them as quickly as possible so I can move on to something happier.  Following Paul’s example, I am called to be content and even boast in my weaknesses and struggles, because they showcase God’s power and goodness.  What a lofty goal . . . one that I could definitely only attain by God’s power and not my own.

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marissahenley.com

I write to remind myself of the truth of God's promises. I share my writing here in case you need to be reminded sometimes, too.

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Over the past few weeks, we’ve taken a deep dive Over the past few weeks, we’ve taken a deep dive into God’s providence: His sustaining power by which He governs and directs all things according to His purpose, without limit and throughout all eternity. When we talk about God’s providence, the question inevitably arises: What about human decisions?

I hate to disappoint you, but this topic has been debated for centuries and probably won’t be satisfactorily explained in this short devotional. 😝 But, as we should with any question we have about God, let’s turn to His Word and see how it shapes our thinking.

In Genesis 45, we find the words Joseph spoke to his brothers, years after they sold him into slavery in Egypt:

“And now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life . . . So it was not you who sent me here, but God.” (Gen 45:5, 8a)

So who caused Joseph to end up in Egypt—God or Joseph’s brothers? Did Joseph’s brothers make a free and sinful choice to sell their brother into slavery? Yes, they did. Did God send Joseph to Egypt for the sake of His good plan to preserve His people? Yes, He did.

We tend to think of causality in human terms as a zero-sum game, meaning there can’t be two causes that are both 100% the cause of an event. But God’s causality is transcendent—it's not like human causality at all. There’s no zero-sum game between God’s providence and our freedom.

God’s Word teaches both the total sovereignty of God and the freedom of His creatures. As we consider this mystery, we must also acknowledge that as His creatures, we are not independent of Him. Even our creaturely freedom is a result of His providence.

So when we say God’s sustaining power directs and governs all things, this includes human decisions, even evil decisions (Gen 50:20) and those made by the most powerful people (Prov 21:1).

I know this has been heavy, and we may not agree on every point. That’s okay. But I hope this truth brings comfort as we remember that nothing can reach us without passing through God’s providential, faithful hands.

No matter what you face this week, God’s providence includes all the human decisions that affect our lives.
This month we’ve been studying God’s providenc This month we’ve been studying God’s providence—His power to sustain, govern, and direct all things, according to His purpose and without limits. Today we’ll see in the book of Isaiah that God’s providence extends through all eternity in the past, present, and future. 

“Remember this and stand firm, recall it to mind, you transgressors, remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose,’ calling a bird of prey from the east, the man of my counsel from a far country. I have spoken, and I will bring it to pass; I have purposed, and I will do it.” (Isaiah 46:8-11)

Isaiah’s prophecy in the previous chapters wasn’t good news for God’s people in Judah. Isaiah prophesied that they would be taken into exile in Babylon, and God would then work through a Persian king rather than through another king of Israel like David. The people of Judah must have felt dread as they heard these prophecies. 

But then God reminded the people that He is not like other gods. God wanted them to remember the truth about Him and therefore stand firm in their exile. According to Bible scholar J. Alec Motyer, these verses are “Isaiah’s final appeal to Israel to accept the Lord’s will and trust his providence.” 

This appeal is made based on what is true about God: 

“There is none like me . . .”— Only the Lord has the power to rule providentially in this world He created. He’s not battling for control; He’s in control. 

“declaring the end from the beginning . . . “ — He orchestrates all of history, from the very beginning to the very end, all by the power of His word. 

“I have purposed, and I will do it.” — The Lord accomplishes all His purposes. If He wills it, He will do it. 

Whether you’re anxious today about global events or the cells in your own body, whether you’re concerned with your past mistakes or the future for your great-grandchildren, remember this and stand firm: No matter what you face this week, God’s providence extends to every event of history and eternity.
A few days ago, I was telling someone how I planne A few days ago, I was telling someone how I planned to avoid some potential problems that could derail our summer travel plans. She replied, “It sounds like you have a backup plan and a backup plan to that backup plan.” Yep, that’s my MO. I love to have a plan, including as many backup plans as possible, just in case. And still my plans are often thwarted by changes I didn’t expect - ugh, that makes me crazy! 

God is not like me. My limited knowledge and limited control cause my plans - and even my backup plans - to sometimes fail. But God has the wisdom, power, and sovereignty to bring about all of His plans. 

Last week we started a series on God’s providence, which refers to His sustaining power that preserves, governs, and directs everything in creation. Today we’ll see that there is no limit to His providence. It extends to all creation in all places and all situations. There is nothing beyond His providential control. 

“For I know that the LORD is great, and that our Lord is above all gods. Whatever the LORD pleases, he does, in heaven and on earth, in the seas and all deeps. He it is who makes the clouds rise at the end of the earth, who makes lightnings for the rain and brings forth the wind from his storehouses.” (Psalm 135:5–7)

In these verses, the psalmists highlights four truths about God. He is the great God above all other gods. He does whatever He pleases. His providential work extends to all of His creation- that means everything! And even the wind and rain aren’t random or purely natural occurrences - they are the providential work of our Creator. 
 
This truth brings comfort because we know we will never encounter circumstances beyond God’s providential care for us. He is good and faithful, and He always accomplishes His purposes. He not only brings forth the wind from His storehouses; He also sent His Son to die for us. We may not understand our suffering or the suffering of those we love, but we can trust God’s unlimited providence. 

No matter what you face this week, God’s providence has no limits.
Last week, I felt overwhelmed with anxiety about e Last week, I felt overwhelmed with anxiety about events happening with all three of my teenagers. (Being the mom of teens is tough, y’all!) As I sat across from them at lunchtime, I silently repeated words paraphrased from the Heidelberg Catechism to remind myself that they are not mine, but belong with body and soul, in life and in death, to their faithful Savior Jesus Christ. 

The truth of God’s providence is the only reason those words bring any comfort to this mama’s heart. I’ve heard people say that the suffering in our lives is due to random chance, but when it happens, God steps in with comfort. If that’s true, God is a supportive friend, but He’s not really God. If our faithful Savior is powerless over the fallen world we live in, then maybe we have a glorious future ahead, but we’re basically left on our own for now. Thankfully, God’s Word teaches us that He is powerfully and providentially ruling here and now. 

God’s providence refers to His sustaining power that preserves and governs everything in the world. He didn’t just create the world like a watchmaker winding a clock and then let it run until Christ returns. He actively rules over His creation in every moment, and He does so according to His perfect will, which is rooted in His unfailing knowledge, wisdom, goodness, and justice. 

We find God’s providence proclaimed in many places in the Bible, but these verses are some of my favorites: 

“In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory.” (Eph 1:11-12) 

In this passage, Paul is specifically talking about our salvation. We’ve been saved according to God’s purpose and given this amazing inheritance in Christ. But God’s purpose doesn’t only extend to our salvation. He works all things according to His will for the praise of His glory. 

We’ll look at God’s providence in more detail over the next few weeks. But for today, let’s find comfort in this truth: No matter what you face this week, your faithful Savior sustains, preserves, and governs every moment.
I have a confession to make: I love to tell people I have a confession to make: I love to tell people what to do. I’m a bossy person, and this character flaw revealed itself early in my childhood. My siblings often told me, “You’re not the boss of me!” Our poor brother had two older sisters telling him what to do, and one day, he snapped, “I don’t need three mommies!” 

It’s a natural human tendency to wonder who’s in charge. Some of us also have the strong desire to be the one in charge; others are looking for someone to follow. But we all understand that someone needs to be the boss. 

For the last few weeks, we’ve been looking at reasons Jesus came. We’ve seen how He is our redeeming Sacrifice, our reconciling Savior, and our righteous Advocate. Scripture also tells us that Jesus Christ is our reigning King. 

“Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” (Philippians 2:9–11) 

God the Father has highly exalted the risen Son. His name is above every name, proving there is no one greater. Ephesians 1:21 tells us that God has seated Him “far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come.” Paul pulls out every extreme phrase he can find, but the human language can’t adequately describe the supremacy of Christ’s reign. 

At Christ’s first coming, only a few knelt in worship—a handful of shepherds and a some traveling kings. The angels sang His praise, but much of the world was silent. As word spread about His birth, the reigning king of His time sought to kill the infant Messiah. 

But at His second coming, every knee will bow. Every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. God will be glorified as all creation sees what we know is true today: Jesus reigns. 

No matter what you face this week, Jesus came to be your reigning King.
In an episode from the first season of The West Wi In an episode from the first season of The West Wing, White House Deputy Communications Director Sam Seaborn is on his way out of the office for a weekend away when he runs back to his desk to answer one last phone call. It’s an old high school acquaintance, now a defense attorney, calling to plead the case of a federal death row inmate seeking a stay of execution. 

The defense attorney needs someone with the ear of the President, so he calls Sam. The condemned man doesn’t just need an advocate, he needs an advocate with power and influence to present persuasive arguments to the one man who can grant a reprieve. 

We need an advocate, too. We are condemned by our sin, and the punishment we deserve is death (Romans 6:23). But the Lamb of God who was the redeeming sacrifice for us and reconciled us to God is now seated at the right hand of the Father. What is He doing as He sits there? He’s advocating for us. 

“My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.” (1 John 2:1)

Jesus has the evidence needed for our forgiveness. John describes our advocate as “Jesus Christ the righteous.” Jesus is not only our redeeming sacrifice, He covers us with His righteousness. He advocates for us to the Father based on the perfect life He lived for us, not any good that we have done. 

Jesus not only has the righteousness needed, He also has the ear of the Father. Romans 8:34 tells us that Jesus Christ is at the right hand of the Father, interceding for us. The Father has given the Son the exalted place at His right hand, and we benefit from it. We have a Savior who has the ear of the Creator and Judge, saying, “She’s mine. She’s covered.”

Because of our righteous advocate, “when we enter into the presence of God, we go not to hear his justice prosecute us but to hear his love plead for us” (William Barclay, The Letter to the Hebrews, p. 19). 

No matter what you face this week, Jesus Christ came to be your righteous Advocate.
I got my first credit card when I was in college. I got my first credit card when I was in college. It was meant for emergencies only, but I became very relaxed with my definition of “emergency.” Is going out to dinner with friends an emergency? What about not having something to wear for a special occasion?

By the time I graduated, I racked up more than $1000 in credit card debt and had no way to pay it. The debt weighed on me—I felt the burden of it every day. Finally, I had to tell my soon-to-be husband that he was marrying into this debt. He was gracious about it, and we used wedding gifts to pay it off. But I regretted starting married life with nothing positive to offer our financial situation. 

Last week we saw that Jesus came to be a redeeming sacrifice for us. Our relationship with God was broken because we couldn’t pay the debt our sin required. But Jesus didn’t just wipe the slate clean, put us back at zero, and leave us to prove ourselves to God on our own. In His life, death, and resurrection, Jesus Christ did all that was necessary to fully reconcile us to God: 

“For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.” (Colossians 1:19–20)

We have peace with God because of the blood Jesus shed on the cross. This is why the baby was born in the stable—to pay our debt and fix the devastation our sin caused in our relationship with God. These verses tell us that His redeeming sacrifice had the power to reconcile all things on earth or in heaven. 

Because the fullness of God dwells in Him, Jesus Christ has the power to reconcile you to God. You don’t need to worry about paying your own debt of sin or getting yourself on God’s positive side with your good works. Christ’s work is sufficient to bring you into a reconciled relationship with your Heavenly Father. 

No matter what you face this week, Jesus Christ came to fully reconcile you to God.
The week after Thanksgiving, most of us fall into The week after Thanksgiving, most of us fall into one of three groups: those who are feeling great about our Christmas preparations, those who are trying not to panic, and those who are blissfully optimistic that Santa and his elves will make, wrap, and deliver the perfect gifts for their loved ones on Christmas Eve. 

When you’re buried neck-deep in shopping lists, tangled tiny lights, and wrapping paper, it’s easy to lose sight of why God the Son came to earth and was born in that Bethlehem stable. 

I’ve got good news for you—He didn’t come just to give you more to do every December. Over the next few Mondays, we’ll look at some of the reasons Jesus came. We’ve been in John 1 for the past few weeks, so let’s start there in John 1:29: 

“The next day [John] saw Jesus coming toward him, and said, ‘Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!’” (John 1:29)

In this verse, John the Baptist proclaims one reason the Son of God walked on earth—to be the Lamb of God who takes away our sin. 

The Lamb of God lived the perfect life. God’s justice requires a perfect sacrifice—a spotless lamb without blemish. Jesus Christ perfectly obeyed His Father and met the standard of righteousness that we fail to reach. 

The Lamb of God died for you. Romans 8:32 says God did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all. After living the perfect life, Jesus Christ took the punishment for your sin as He suffered and died on the cross. 

The Lamb of God rose again. First Corinthians 15:55 reminds us that the Lamb of God defeated death for us: “Oh death, where is your victory?” When Jesus Christ rose again, He proved His power to give eternal life to His redeemed people. 

In His life, death, and resurrection, the Lamb of God accomplished all that was required for your redemption. He came with a mission, and He completed it. Now that’s a reason to rejoice as we prepare to celebrate His birth! 

No matter what you face this week, Jesus came to be a redeeming sacrifice for you.
For the past couple of weeks, we’ve been studyin For the past couple of weeks, we’ve been studying John’s description of Jesus in John 1. We’ve seen that God’s Son is eternal and all things were created through Him and for Him. Today we see that He brings light and life to a world in bondage to darkness and death:

“In him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it . . . The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world.” (John 1:4-5, 9)

Again, John wants us to make a connection to the creation story in Genesis 1. God created light and separated light from darkness (Genesis 1:3-4). He made the sun and the stars to give us light (Genesis 1:14-18). He created man and “breathed into his nostrils the breath of life” (Genesis 2:7). God is the giver of light and life.

Because of sin, the world God made was lost in darkness and destined for death. God sent His Son to bring the light of life:

“Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, ‘I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.’” (John 8:12)

Now light and life could be heard, seen, and touched in the Messiah, Jesus Christ. As an eyewitness to Jesus’s life, death, and resurrection, John testifies about the “word of life”—that “which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we looked upon and have touched with our hands” (1 John 1:1).

God is the giver of light and life. In Jesus Christ, God shines the light in our darkness, that we may see our sin and confess our need for the Savior who died to give us eternal life. The darkness cannot overcome the light Christ brings. He has met our greatest need—our need to be saved from sin and death—so we can trust Him with every other need we have.

No matter what you face this week, Jesus gives you the light of life.
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