children Archives - Marissa Henley

The Lord is Sovereign Over Every Detail {No Matter What Monday}

January 22, 2018 by Marissa Leave a Comment

By the time my daughter finished opening presents by the Christmas trees of various family members this year, she was thrilled to own several new beanie boos. If your home hasn’t been invaded by these tiny stuffed animals, let me fill you in on the craze. They are small stuffed animals with huge creepy eyes. The brilliant toy-makers have come up with an endless variety—cats, dogs, owls, tigers, and on and on. My daughter owns dozens of them, and each one is precious to her. She knows their names and celebrates all of their birthdays, which she finds printed on their tags. She loves them and cares for them because of their great value to her.

Do you know that you have great value to your sovereign heavenly Father? Jesus tells us so in Matthew 10:

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered.” (Matthew 10:29-30)

Two for a penny—back in Jesus’ day, sparrows were the cheapest animal you could buy for your sacrifice. (I wish beanie boos were that inexpensive!) Even the poor could afford to buy one or two. And we read in Luke that if you paid two pennies, you could get five sparrows—they were of so little value that they’d throw in an extra for free.

And yet, these insignificant birds are of great value in the eyes of their Creator. Not one falls to the ground without His knowledge and involvement.

God’s care for us, His beloved children, goes beyond an awareness of whether we’re in a tree or on the ground. He knows each and every hair on our heads. God is concerned with and sovereign over even the smallest details of our lives.

Nothing touches one hair on your head before passing through the hands of your loving, faithful, sovereign heavenly Father.

No matter what you face this week, the Lord is sovereign over every detail of your days.

(Photo by Josh Adamski on Unsplash)

Anchor Your Faith in God’s Faithfulness {No Matter What Monday}

August 7, 2017 by Marissa Leave a Comment

I used to think I was good at keeping promises, and then I had kids.

I want to be faithful to my word, and I try to not make promises I can’t keep. But sometimes, I start the day saying, “Sure, I can play chess with you today.” Then each of the day’s tasks takes longer than I expected. The afternoon gets longer, and my temper gets shorter. All of a sudden, it’s 5:30 pm. I should be fixing dinner, but I’m fighting the temptation to hide in my closet with a pint of Halo Top ice cream. The last thing I want to do at that moment sit across a chess board from a chatty 11-year-old.

As I strive to be faithful to my promises, my trust is not in my own faithfulness – and this is great news! My faith is in the faithfulness of One who always keeps His promises.

“God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?” (Numbers 23:19)

God is not like us. He doesn’t lie; He doesn’t change His mind. If He says it, He will do it. Each and every one of His promises will be perfectly fulfilled. What a beautiful anchor of hope for our souls!

When God promises to help us, we can depend on His help (Psalm 121:2). When He says He will strengthen us and hold us, He can and will do it (Isaiah 41:10). When He says He will wipe every tear from our eyes, we can count on a glorious future with Him (Revelation 21:4).

In each Monday devotional this month, we will read about God’s faithfulness to us. As we look ahead to a new school year, make commitments, and see the potential of a fresh start, let’s rejoice that God is faithful even when we’re not. We can trust Him to keep all of His promises us.

No matter what you face this week, anchor your faith in the faithfulness of your Heavenly Father.

When a Melted Heart Meets the Gospel

January 15, 2016 by Marissa Leave a Comment

Have you ever watched as God worked in a loved one’s heart right before your eyes? As a mom, I have the honor of seeing the Lord at work in my children’s lives, usually gradually and more slowly than I would choose. But last week, I witnessed God’s handiwork unfold in a matter of minutes.

As I was busy making dinner, I handed down a small behavioral correction to my 6-year-old daughter. A few minutes later, I overheard her confess to the dog that she thought she might go to hell because of the mistake. I left the barbeque pork chops, called her to me, and pulled her onto my lap at the kitchen table. Then I asked, “How good do you think you need to be to go to heaven?”

She shrugged.

“Do you have to be really good? Just a little good? More good than bad?”

More shrugging.

“Darling, did you know that God says we have to be perfect to go to heaven?”

Disbelief crept onto her face, and she asked in a small voice: “Perfect?”

“Yes,” I answered, “God is holy. He cannot be in the presence of sin. We must be sinless and perfect to be with Him in heaven.”

It was not the first time I have spoken these words to her. We’ve talked about the gospel truths of our sinfulness and need for Christ over and over again. Most of the time, she seems uninterested, and I’ve been asking God to soften her heart.

He must’ve not just softened it, but completely melted it. Because this time, upon hearing that God demands perfection, my sweet daughter started weeping.

Tears streamed down her face and the sound of her wailing brought her brothers from opposite ends of the house to see what was wrong. I shooed them away and tried to soothe her.

“There’s more, Sarah Kate, there’s more,” I said, as I held her and rubbed her back.

Because God’s demand for perfection isn’t the end of the gospel story.

When she was quiet, I continued. I explained how Jesus lived a perfect life for her. He died for her, taking the punishment for her sin. He’s given her His record of perfection. If she is in Christ, when God looks at her, He doesn’t see her sin – He sees Christ’s perfection.

Once again, her eyes filled with tears. But these quiet tears were accompanied by a smile. The truth of the gospel moved her from hopelessness and despair to quiet rest. It is so sweet to trust in Jesus.

She gets it. She gets it. I pray that she will be filled every day with an awareness of Christ’s work on her behalf. And yet, I know that she will struggle. She will feel the weight of the world’s demands, of the expectations of others, of her own desire for perfection. She will be distracted by busyness, by worry, and by materialism.

I know this because I’m living it. And my prayer for her is my prayer for myself: that we will live each day in the freedom of the gospel, knowing that God’s demands have been met perfectly by our Savior.

40 Biblical Principles For Parenting

February 17, 2015 by Marissa 1 Comment

Recently, I evaluated the books, advice, and paradigms which have influenced my parenting. While I believe that parenting books and counsel from wise parents can be useful and good, I want to ensure that the primary impact on my parenting decisions comes from God’s Word.

I embarked on a search for resources that describe what the Bible says about parenting. There are countless lists of verses to use when teaching your children to behave. I already own and use many of these. But I was looking for verses telling ME how to behave as a parent. And this was surprisingly difficult.

I didn’t discover many resources that use Scripture to teach parents how to behave toward their children. (However, one helpful publication I found was “A Checklist for Parents” by Pam Forster.) Since no one else was going to make this easy for me, I decided to compile my own list. Using Forster’s checklist and my own search of God’s Word, I wrote a list of biblical principles for my own parenting. It turns out that the Bible has a lot to say to parents! And so I thought I should share what I found, with the hope that other parents might be encouraged by it.

Due to the large number of verses, I grouped them into four categories. First, I have general biblical principles for parenting. These are general principles regarding our role as parents. Second, I have biblical principles for discipline. These relate to how we discipline our children, since this is a topic addressed multiple times by Scripture.

Next, I listed principles for how we should relate to our children. These principles apply to loving all our neighbors. But they are important to consider, since following these biblical admonitions is often more difficult in our own home.

Finally, I listed principles for our personal spiritual growth. As we grow in Christlikeness, our parenting will reflect that change. Our children will benefit as we draw nearer to our Savior and deepen our understanding of God’s Word.

As you may have noticed, only a fraction of these verses speak directly to parents or the act of parenting. As I studied, I started to realize that our cultural emphasis on parenting doesn’t seem to be reflected in Scripture. We are preoccupied with parenting, because we are so afraid of getting it wrong. I’m not saying that parenting isn’t important. However, I think our cultural obsession with being a good parent might not be biblically accurate. If we were primarily focused on growing in obedience to Christ and dependence on Him, I believe wise parenting would naturally flow from our submission to God and His Word.

This list is far from complete. I’m certain that I could study God’s Word for years and still have more to learn about motherhood. But there’s enough on this list to keep me busy long after my kids have grown up and started families of their own. It’s a good place to start.

What biblical principles for parenting would you add to this list? Leave me a comment with your ideas!

Click here for a downloadable PDF.

40 BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES FOR PARENTING

1. General biblical principles for parenting:

Pray for your children (specifically, for them to follow God’s commands)

(I Samuel 12:23, I Chronicles 29:19)

Give praise generously

(Proverbs 3:27)

Pass on wisdom

(Proverbs 4:11, Proverbs 31:26)

Teach your children to find their refuge in the Lord

(Proverbs 14:26)

Tell your children of God’s wonderful deeds and His faithfulness

(Psalm 78:4, Psalm 145:4, Isaiah 38:19)

Rightly handle the word of truth

(II Timothy 2:15)

Teach them the Gospel and prepare them to recognize false doctrine

(Romans 1:16, Galatians 1:8-9)

2. Biblical principles for discipline:

Be diligent in discipline in order to drive out foolishness

(Proverbs 13:24, Proverbs 22:15, Proverbs 29:15)

Teach your children God’s commands

(Deuteronomy 6:6-7, I Samuel 12:23, Psalm 103:18-19)

Reprove, rebuke and exhort with patience and teaching

(Proverbs 3:12, II Timothy 4:2)

Set an example for your children and do not lead them into sin

(Proverbs 20:7, Matthew 18:6, I Peter 5:2-3)

Restore them gently when they sin

(Galatians 6:1-2)

Exhort and encourage them to walk in a manner worthy of God by loving others and doing good works

(I Thessalonians 2:11-12, Hebrews 10:24)

3. Biblical principles for relating to your children:

Have compassion on your children and remember their weakness

(Psalm 103:13-14)

Do not bear a grudge against them

(Leviticus 19:18)

Love them with love that is patient and kind, not boastful or envious or rude, not irritable or insisting on your own way, bearing all things and rejoicing in the truth

(I Corinthians 13:4-7)

Display the fruits of the Spirit toward your children (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness gentleness and self-control)

(Galatians 5:22-23)

Walk in a manner worthy of your calling by showing humility, gentleness, patience, and bearing with them in love

(Ephesians 4:1-3)

Do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouth

(Ephesians 4:29)

Encourage them and give grace with your words

(Ephesians 4:29)

Be reasonable and joyful

(Philippians 4:4-5)

Be compassionate, kind, humble, meek, and patient

(Colossians 3:12)

Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you

(Colossians 3:13)

Lay down your life for them

(I John 3:16)

Love in deed and truth and not just words

(I John 3:18)

Love them as God has loved you

(I John 4:11)

4. Biblical principles for our own spiritual growth as parents:

Seek God’s kingdom first

(Matthew 6:33)

Love God and others

(Matthew 22:38-39, Romans 13:9)

Walk with integrity

(Proverbs 20:7)

Choose your advisors carefully and remain grounded in God’s Word

(Psalm 1:1-2)

Provide for your children and your household

(II Corinthians 12:14, I Timothy 5:8)

Remember you will sow what you reap

(Galatians 6:7)

Wives, submit to your husbands

(Ephesians 5:22)

Fathers, do not provoke your children

(Ephesians 6:4)

Do not be anxious about anything

(Philippians 4:6-7)

Pray about everything

(Philippians 4:6-7)

Think on what is true and right

(Philippians 4:8)

Be thankful

(I Thessalonians 5:18)

Draw near to the throne of grace to find mercy and grace to help in time of need

(Hebrews 4:16)

Ask God for wisdom

(James 1:5)

List of Scripture references*: Leviticus 19:18; Deuteronomy 6:6-7; I Samuel 12:23; I Chronicles 29:19; Psalm 1:1-2, 78:4, 103:13-14, 103:17-18, 145:4; Proverbs 3:12, 3:27, 4:11, 13:24, 14:26, 20:7, 22:15, 29:15, 31:26; Isaiah 38:19; Matthew 6:33, 18:6, 22:38-39; Romans 1:16, 13:9; I Corinthians 13:4-7; II Corinthians 12:14; Galatians 1:8-9, 5:22-23, 6:1, 6:7; Ephesians 4:1-3, 4:29, 5:22, 6:4; Philippians 4:4-8; Colossians 3:12-13; I Thessalonians 2:11-12; I Thessalonians 5:18; I Timothy 5:8; II Timothy 2:15, 4:2; Hebrews 4:16, 10:24; James 1:5; I Peter 5:2-3; I John 3:16; I John 3:18; I John 4:11

*The above Scripture references can be copied and pasted into the search box on www.esvbible.org to read the entire list of verses.